“He wasn’t strong enough. His body and mind warped. But then came Marsyas and he was the perfect vessel. I lived with him, in him, for ages. Absorbed his sorrows and worries, his joys and fears. Indeed sometimes… sometimes Jai feels similar to Marsyas.”
“What a coincidence, then,” I mutter. “That you found a second perfect vessel, and a fae king who wants the same thing as you.”
“I said our motivations coincide. We both want to save our people. We both want to open a gate.”
“He wants to invade and wreak havoc.”
“In his own world?”
I scoff. “Why would that shock you?”
“He’s a king. A leader. He wants what is best for the fae.”
“Not all leaders think like that. Some only want more power. Some would gladly send their people to death to make themselves richer.”
He frowns. “I only want to rejoin my people.”
“And you don’t think that your world has changed since you left? A hundred years, Phaethon, at the very least. You don’t think that your people may have written you off for dead and chosen a new leader?”
He’s silent. I realize we have reached my room, marked by the lilac door with a symbol like a crown engraved on it in black and gold.
“Phaethon?”
He shakes his head. “A royal guest room.” He shoves the door and limps into my room. “It’s as if the king knew all along who you were.”
“Put me down.”
He lowers me until my feet hit the floor. I lost my shoes somewhere on the way—probably back at the terrace when he grabbed me, kissed me, entered me. Shattered me.
The jacket draped over me falls off. I lift it and slip my arms into the sleeves. It’s enormous on me, the breadth of the shoulders, the length of the sleeves. It makes no sense to button it up. It would be way too loose, even around my chest.
I feel warm liquid spilling between my legs, and I don’t know if it’s his release or blood. I’ve crossed a threshold I didn’t expect to cross in this palace, in this moment of trials and revelations.
Not with Phaethon, that’s for sure.
It hurts a little when I shift my weight, but the ache isn’t sharp. It’s deep and warm, like a burning flame, and I find… I’m okay. Okay that it’s done. Okay that it was him.
A lie. I’m not okay. I don’t know how I feel. I have no idea what I’m doing.
He lifts a hand to my face. An awkward caress. “You winced. Did I hurt you?”
“I still don’t understand why you’re doing this,” I whisper. “You don’t like me. You don’t care for me one way or another. You have no respect for me.”
“Not so, Little Human. A few things have changed since I first met you.”
“Such as?”
“You saved Jai’s life in the arena. And you kept fighting against the odds. My kind has respect for courage and steadfastness. I have respect for you, Leli.”
Respect. That makes sense. He’s not human. He commanded armies. Respect among comrades.
Not love. Not affection. Still, that’s a positive feeling, right?
“So we’re… friends?” I hazard. “That would be kind of weird. We slept together.”
“Fucked, you mean.”
“So crude for a celestial being. Is that something you learned from Marsyas or Jai?”