Page 14 of The Phyre that Burns
“It’s time to face my fear. I’ve been running for too long.”
Since I foundout Ginae had been assigned to my office, I could barely focus. Sleep didn’t come easily last night because my imagination ran wild. I said so many prayers about our first encounter, but most of all, I prayed Ginae would give me the opportunity to explain and find it in her heart to forgive me.
There were no words to describe how horrible I felt, but if she loved me like I loved her, I was sure she felt the same pain or worse. The fallout with my parents was bad, . . . almost irreparable, but I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Although my actions didn’t get me what I wanted at the time, it was worth it. I prayed it wasn’t too late for our love story to have a happy ending.
My alarm hadn’t sounded, but I sat up and stretched before getting out of bed. It was pointless to lie there for another forty-five minutes when I knew sleep would continue to evade me. After using the bathroom and brushing my teeth, I dressed for my workout and headed to my home gym.
Everyone who’d visited my home commented that it was too much house for a single man. I agreed, but I was hopeful I wouldn’t be single forever. I bought this house with my future family in mind. Ginae and I discussed the type of house we wanted, and I did my best to bring our vision to life. Whether or not she would ever see it remained to be seen, but I was hopeful.
After finishing my workout, I showered, dressed, and enjoyed breakfast while reading the newspaper on my phone, using an app. I’d hoped my meal would settle the nerves in my stomach, but there was no such luck. I ate as much as I could before gathering my things and heading to the office.
About twenty minutes into my forty-five-minute ride, Lennon called me. I knew all he wanted to do was talk shit, but I answered anyway.
“Wassup?” I answered.
“I bet you over there feeling like it’s the first day of school,” he teased.
I chuckled. “I can’t lie. I couldn’t sleep for shit last night. My nerves are haywire.”
“What are you nervous about?”
“I’ve waited a long time for this, and I don’t want anything to go wrong.”
“Do you realize there are a plethora of things that could go wrong?”
“Nigga, I’m not here for your negativity. Why the fuck would you say that?”
“I’m just being real. Can you imagine going through all this trouble, and she doesn’t show up? Or she does show up and saysfuck you for the next six months? You could be setting yourself up for pain and disappointment.”
“Fuck you, Len, and don’t bring your ass to my side of the building today.”
I ended the call because I truly didn’t need him to give me a list of things that could go wrong, because I’d already gone over a thousand things in my head. I put on some nineties hip-hop, turned the volume up on the radio, and hoped the music helped me shift my attitude back to the positive side of things.
After stopping byBlack Elm Bagels & More, I was the first to arrive at the office, as usual. I had a total of six nurses, with two of them being nurse practitioners. They didn’t usually begin arriving until about twenty minutes before we opened. Ginae was replacing one of my nurse practitioners who had to take an extended leave of absence to care for her ailing father. I also had two front desk receptionists and one records manager.
I dropped my laptop bag off in my office and went to our kitchen and break room to set up the food I’d bought. I had to focus on something to keep my mind off Ginae and how I would react the moment I saw her.
For a brief moment, I got lost in what I was doing and paused when I sensed someone behind me. I knew it was Ginae, but I couldn’t turn around. This shit could go either way, but I was hoping that since she showed up, it would go in the direction I’d been praying for.
“I can’t believe you’re actually here. I was afraid you’d change your mind once you realized you were assigned to work with me.”
“I accepted the assignment before I knew, or I probably would have.”
That hurt.
“I’m sure you could’ve still backed out.”
“Possibly, but I decided to be a big girl and follow through with my commitment since I was already in town.”
I finally turned around, and I couldn’t believe my eyes. Ginae was even more beautiful than I remembered, which I didn’t think was possible. Her golden skin looked vibrant, even at this early morning hour. She wore her hair in a bob that hung a little past her chin with a part down the middle, which was different than the shoulder-length style she sported back in college.
She leaned against the doorframe with a bag over the other shoulder. Even in her scrubs, I could see her body was still banging. She was thicker now than she was at twenty-three, and I couldn’t wait until she gave me permission to explore the curves she didn’t have when we were last together.
“You were already in town when you found out?”
“Yeah. I failed to look closely at the details because I was confident I wouldn’t be working with you. The sunflowers tipped me off, not to mention the fully stocked fridge and pantry.”
“I thought it would be helpful to have some things to get you started. Are sunflowers still your favorite?”
