Page 20 of A Lesson in Obedience
I sighed, picking off a piece of bread and throwing it at him. That got me an eye roll from my girlfriend as she checked her phone. I clucked my tongue before answering him and getting a heated stare back.
Ah, but your flirting may or may not turn me on. Besides, we both know I don’t mind sharing.
I opened the door slowly,careful not to spill the two coffee mugs I carried. I leaned against the wall, looking out the one window that let light filter into the room. It was getting closer to the end of August, so the days of random fog were becoming less and less. The sun wasn’t as bright as it could have been due to some various clouds, but the natural light still flooded in, covering the room.
He looked over his shoulder when he heard me come in, immediately looking down at his feet. I kicked the door closed behind me, hearing it click before I made my way across the room. He had made thesheets I’d given him to use with the air mattress look nice, almost as if he’d never used them to sleep.
I held the mug out to him, the steam rising between us. He looked from the coffee to my face, hesitating.
“It’s just coffee,” I said, inching the mug closer.
He nodded, reaching out and taking it. “Thanks.”
I peeked over at his hand, trying to get a better look at his forefinger. He noticed my staring and lifted up his hand.
“I have it on, don’t worry. It’s not like I need it though. If I wanted to leave I could, but I know your brother would make you find me and then beat my face in.” He shook his head, taking a sip of the coffee.
“Asher doesn’t make me do anything.”
“Alright, fine. But he isn’t my biggest fan, so?—”
“Can you blame him?”
Grayson swallowed, looking down into his mug. He started to worry his bottom lip. “No, I can’t.”
I turned around, walking towards the other side of the room. I took a long drink of my coffee—nearly draining it— wishing I had added something of the alcoholic variety to it. “I’m not going to pretend like I don’t understand why you made your decisions. I know school means a lot to you and doing right by your parents, but fuck, you were working with my dad? Do you understand how fucked that is? You know how I feel about him and so much shit I don’t like talking about.”
He placed his mug on the ground, taking a deep breath. “I know, okay? It’s no excuse and I knew you would hate me for it. It’s not like I enjoyed it. Your dad can be a scary son of a bitch, especially when Chancellor Fowler is right next to him.”
I faced him, running a hand through my hair in frustration. “Did you even consider telling me? Even once?”
He took a step towards me. “Your dad told me if I did, I would regret it. He told me the best way to make sure no one got hurt would be to keep my mouth shut and just do what I was told. I didn’t knowif he meant my parents would be hurt, I didn’t know if he meant you… so I just followed their rules.”
My dad could have a short fuse and I would be lying to myself if I didn’t believe that he would use threats to get what he wanted. He could have used any shadow wielder to do his bidding, but he picked Grayson. It fucking hurt me to think about, but it hurt even more that the end result ended up being Riley in any sort of pain, especially pain I couldn’t fix quickly.
I sucked in a deep breath, I let it out shakily, rolling my shoulders. “And all of that resulted in kidnapping witches and hurting Riley.”
He ran a shaky hand over the back of his neck. “I tried to get them to tell me why, but they wouldn’t. I already told you I made sure those girls weren’t hurt. I would never have knowingly put Riley in danger if I knew this had anything to do with her. River…I would never…”
I ran up to him, throwing my mug past his head and hearing it shatter against the wall. I got right up to his face, feeling his breath on my skin. “But you did! I know you didn’t know, but it happened! I can put myself and my hurt aside but whether you meant to or not, you fucking—” I grabbed the sides of his face, forcing him to focus solely on me. My words came out through my teeth. My frustration elevating immensely and I knew my hold on him had to hurt, “you fucking hurt her! You hurt our girl, Grayson!”
“I fucking know! I want to tell her that I made a bad choice, that I didn’t know what else to do! The threat of all my hard work, everything my parents wanted for me being torn apart scared me and I panicked!” He didn’t try to remove himself from my hold. He didn’t try to push me back. He just stood there, accepting what I had to say, letting it sink in. His lip quivered before he spoke again, He sucked in a breath, looking up at the ceiling. “I saw the look on her face when Marianne died, River. Believe me, I know I fucking hurt her. I didn’t make those pieces of glass hit Marianne’s body but to Riley I might as well have.”
If the moment was any different, I would have kissed him with how close we were. I could tell he was sad and defeated; I wanted to make it better and kiss away his pain. I knew he would have done the same for me. As much as Asher wanted me to feel disdain for him, I just couldn’t. He had no tension in his body and if I let him go, he probably would have collapsed against me. His mind was quiet and tired when I went into his head to listen to his thoughts. I hated that this whole thing with Riley involved him in this way.
Grayson meant a lot to me. I could admit that I loved him, but Riley and her feelings were my priority. Until she could look him in the eyes and forgive him, I had to keep him at a small distance.
We just looked at each other for a minute, time not meaning a fucking thing.
“River…” he whispered, looking down at my mouth and back up into my eyes. His dark brown irises looked the most innocent I’d ever seen them.
I pressed my lips together, feeling my heart palpitating. I closed my eyes. “Does my dad still talk to you? Mentally?”
I opened my eyes, noticing that he had placed his hands on my biceps. “No. I promise you, I would have told you if he was. I know Asher won’t believe me, but my concern is for Riley. Chancellor Fowler might have given her up but that doesn’t mean he has loosened his grip. He is letting her be free because hecan, he told her as much with closing the school. She can’t just decide to run away or not show back up. Whatever the chancellor and your dad want, I won’t do it, but he knows who she is now and that’s dangerous.”
I moved my hands from his face to his shoulders, letting my thumbs skate against his collarbones. I chewed on the inside of my cheek in thought. “I won’t let him, or my dad, hurt her. She’s at Corrin’s so I know she’s safe, but I’m going to go get her….”
The door opened and my brother leaned against the threshold, his eyebrows furrowed behind his glasses. He let out an annoyed sigh, giving Grayson the most lethal death glare I’d ever seen. “River, we need to talk. Now.”
