Page 57 of Someone to Remember
“You wouldn’t be with someone who couldn’t handle it. You’d have kicked me to the curb a long time ago if I were like that.”
“You’re right about that. I’ve kicked a few others to the curb over the years.”
“Their loss, sweetheart.”
Thirteen
Brielle
With my son, Charlie, asleep, I settle on the sofa with a glass of wine, my phone and the dating app I recently joined. I can’t get over the flood of messages that’ve poured in since I posted my profile four days ago. Every message is full of bullshit, platitudes, nonsense. I can’t imagine how I’ll ever sift through the swamp full of crap to find someone I might want to get to know.
I text my widow friend Naomi, who helped me set up the profile after months of pleading with me to give it a whirl.This app is ridiculous!
She responds with laughing emojis.You gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince.
Ew. I’m not in the right frame of mind for this tonight.
I get that. I’ve been a mess all day, and I barely know her—or him.
I keep thinking about poor Lexi hearing this news, which she will eventually.
I know. Me, too. I’m glad she got to have today, though. No one deserves a happily ever after more than she does.
True.
Lexi took care of her husband, Jim, who had ALS, and was left with crushing medical debt that was finally alleviated thanks to our friend Joy, who found a grant program for family members burdened with medical debt. What a miracle that was for Lexi—and what a miracle Joy is for all of us.
Seeing Lexi happily in love and now engaged to Tom Terrific was just what the rest of us needed today while dealing with the awful news about Will.
Naomi calls me. “So there’s not one dude who sparks the slightest interest?”
“There’s so much crap, I don’t even know what to look for. I’m not sure that this is the right thing for me.”
“Brielle… You’re a single mom who can’t go out and meet new people the way most singles do. Without the apps, you’re going to turn to moldy cheese while your son is growing up.”
I nearly choke on the sip of wine I was taking. “Moldy cheese? Seriously?”
“I read that hymens can grow back if there’s not enough traffic.”
“That is not true! Shut up.”
She cackles with laughter.
“You’re ridiculous.”
“Am I wrong? Are you or are you not collecting dust at home while life marches forward with terrifying speed?”
She’s not wrong. Charlie will soon befour, which is impossible to believe, as is the fact that his dad, Mark, has been dead four years already, too, killed in a skiing accident while at his brother’s bachelor party weekend. I was left to deliver and raise our son on my own, which has been my sole focus for all this time.
Lately, though, the loneliness has become harder to handle. I confided that to Naomi, thus the dating app.
“I’m collecting dust. You’re right. I can’t believe it’s been four years already. How is that even possible?”
“I know. It’s crazy. It’ll be three years for David soon, which is so hard to believe. I didn’t think I’d survive a day without him, let aloneyears.” Her fiancé died of lymphoma, and because they never got the chance to be married, she jokingly refers to herself as a widow wannabe. Not that anyone would want to be, but we tell her she’s as much a widow as the rest of us.
“You’re doing great, Nai.”
“Eh, I guess. In many ways, I’m still on the starting blocks in the aftermath.”
