Page 47 of His Reward
I grimace as I remember Auntie Erica’s fetishized comment about Malcolm earlier today.Oh, yes.Break me off a piece of that white chocolate.I scolded her she wouldn’t like it if a white person called herdark chocolate, and she gave me the stinkiest of stink eyes.
The thing is, I didn’t really do it because her words were offensive.Something awakened inside me when she made the comment.I felt like a dragon breathing fire to protect its treasure from a thief.
“I’m not lying,” I finally say, lowering my gaze.On one hand, I’m afraid of telling my sister the truth, but there’s a certain relief in it too.Carrying a secret as big as this one has been a burden.“We haven’t… you know…gotten that far.”
“But you want to?”
Yes.
Warmth fills my face at how quickly the answer surfaces in my mind.
For the past four days, I’ve been on edge from an internal war.My body constantly craves for Malcolm to finish what he started, my mind conjures up the filthiest fantasies of him, and my moral voice scolds me that these cravings and fantasies makes me a bad person.
I thought Malcolm would break his promise to never touch me again by now.If I’m being honest, a part of me hopes he would.Especially in those thrilling moments when I catch him looking at me with dark, hungry eyes.
“I don’t want to answer that question,” I say.
“Alright.I get it.But I wouldn’t have a problem with it if you and him are… you know…” She lowers her voice.“Together.”
I stare at my sister, stunned by her casual acceptance of the situation.Mom and Dad, on the other hand, won’t be so open-minded.
“Why not?”
“Because it makes sense.You guys went through some scary shit together that night he saved you from the fire.You both could have died, and I can see a special bond forming from that.And he’s been there for you during all this craziness with the intruder.Yeah, it’s forbidden love, but…the heart wants what it wants.”
I let out an amused huff and roll my eyes that she would make that reference, even though it’s relevant.
“You really are something else.”
She laughs and grabs my hand, leading me back to the table.
19
June
Malcolm and I move the loveseat and the coffee table, making room for my self-defence lessons.
He offered to teach me this morning over breakfast, and I jumped at the chance, excited to learn how to protect myself instead of constantly needing to be rescued by him.
Now that we’re facing each other, it dawns on me we’re likely going to share a lot of physical contact during my lesson.My stomach gets tight and quivery at the thought.That’s dangerous territory for us, which is why I’ve been avoiding getting too close to him this past week.
Oh, well.It’s too late to back out now, and I don’t want to either.I want to learn what he intends to teach me.That’s what I’m going to focus on.I’ll block any inappropriate thoughts from entering my mind.
“OK, first, you need to know the main vulnerable points,” he begins.“The eyes, the nose, the throat, and the groin.”He taps on his fingers as he lists them off.“If you’re able to attack one of those, you stand a higher chance of the best self-defence of all: running away as fast as you can.”
I nod.“Poke them in the eyes, hit them in the nose and throat, kick them in the no-no square.”
He smiles.“Pretty much.And, remember, when you’re defending yourself against someone who wants to harm you, don’t hesitate for even a second.Stay committed to what you’re doing and give it all you got.”
I nod again, then grimace.“I hope I don’t accidentally hurt you while I’m practising.”
“Don’t worry about that.We’ll go easy today, but we’ll train harder once the protective gear I ordered last night shows up.”
“OK.Until then, I’ll do my best not to kick you in the twig and berries.”
He laughs.“Twig and berries, huh?”His chuckle fades into a smirk.“Trust me, sweetheart.It isn’t a twig.”
A thrill goes through me at his confident statement.He’s right.I saw the impressive shape of it.If only he’d peeled down his boxers and—
