Page 31 of Whatever He Wants
“Thenyoucan tell her my answer is no.”
“You should go, Denise.”His expression turns somber.“Gordon fell off a ladder, and I think he’s in rough shape.”
My mood switches from irritation at Gayle to dismay over my dad.I resent him for how he treated me the last time we spoke, but I still love him, and I hate that he’s hurt.
“But Dad doesn’t want me there,” I say.
“He does.He said so.”
My eyebrows lift.“Huh.Shocking.”
“If you really don’t want to go, I won’t push, but it could be a chance for you and your father to make up.”
Isaac looks away, his expression pensive, then he takes a heavy breath and holds my gaze again.
“I never told you this, but Camille and I had a fight the morning she died.A stupid one.I had a bad habit of leaving my cup in the sink with some leftover coffee instead of dumping it out and putting it in the dishwasher.I didn’t do it on purpose.Just an absentminded thing.Camille hated it.She would remind me not to do it, but I would forget.
“That morning, she snapped at me for doing it again.Like a fucking asshole, I told her she wouldn’t have to worry about it much longer.Soon, I’d be out of her life once our divorce was finalized.That was the last thing I said to her.Not an apology.Not a promise to do better.Something shitty and uncalled for that I can never take back.”
He shakes his head as if he’s reliving the moment, anger tightening his brow.I want to reach over and stroke his arm to comfort him, but I resist.Physical contact with him is dangerous for my morals.
“Forgiving your father might be difficult.But it’s easier than living with the regret of never working things out if something happened to him.”
I play with the hem of my top, remembering the huge fight I had with my dad before I left home.
Before he met Gayle, my dad raised me by himself after my mom passed away in a car accident.We used to have a good relationship until the drama with Matt and college.
Looking back, I understand why my actions angered him.I’m mad at myself too, after gaining more common sense.It was stupid to walk away from a good college because I wanted to stay close to my boyfriend.
However, my dad’s threat did not go over well at the time.As long as you live under my roof, you have to do whatever I say.That felt like a challenge from a dictator, and every cell in my body demanded rebellion.
Clinging to a guy who wasn’t worth it ruined my relationship with my dad.His prediction that Matt would disappoint me turned out to be true.What if he crows about that?I won’t take it well, and we might get into another fight.
I’ll see how it goes.Isaac has a point.I don’t want to live with regret.I’ve already lost my mom forever.It’s time I tried mending the rift with my dad and forgiving Gayle.Resentment might be invisible, but it’s so heavy.It would be a relief to set it down and patch things up with them.
“OK.You changed my mind.I’ll go.If it turns out to be a mistake—”
“We’ll leave so fast, my tires will squeal as we peel out of there.”
I chuckle and he smiles, our solemn mood lifted.
Our meal arrives, and we dig in.The verdict—the wings are decent, but they’re not the best in the city like his friend claimed.We joke about becoming informal judges, trying different spots to find the best wing joint.After we finish eating, we wash up, but linger at our table while nursing our drinks.
“I’m sorry about the other night,” Isaac says.“For losing my shit with Matt.”His gaze turns heated.“Not the part before he showed up.”
I sweep my hair behind my ear and lick my lips, trying to ignore the flutter in my stomach.
Since we’re talking about Matt, I should tell Isaac about the break-up.It’s risky, though.If being with Matt didn’t deter Isaac from pursuing me, he’ll ramp up his efforts now that Matt’s gone.But since he’ll find out eventually, might as well tell him now.I’ll stop him if he tries anything.
“Matt and I broke up after you left,” I blurt out.“He moved out that night.”
He straightens, surprise on his face before it’s replaced by a satisfied smile.I don’t want to explore why that excites me.
“That’s good news.The best I’ve heard in a long time.Why did you guys break up?”
“Because both of us sucked.He was a bad boyfriend, and I was a bad girlfriend.”I lower my gaze to my empty drinking glass.“He found out about us.He saw the hickey you left on my neck and accused me of sleeping with you.”
“I wish his accusation were true,” he says.
