Page 106 of Feels Like Love
He nodded. “My head fucking hurts.”
I frowned and fought back tears. “My heart hurts.”
He pulled me closer, and we lay there a while. Together. Was this what it was like for Tessa and Tristan? They’d been together for most of their lives. And knowing the way I felt about Bennett, I couldn’t even imagine what Tristan was going through right now.
“I’m scared,” I whispered. I wasn’t just thinking about Tessa, though she weighed heavily on my mind. I was referring to Bennett and me and how vulnerable I felt. I’d given him my body, heart, and soul. He owned me. And if I ever lost him… it would destroy me.
“I think we’re all scared,” he said. “A brain tumor is fucking terrifying.”
“It just… It feels like it came out of the blue.”
Bennett was silent, but I could hear him thinking. Finally, he said, “I should’ve known.”
“What?” I pulled back to look at him. “What are you talking about?”
“The headaches. Fatigue. The symptoms were all there.”
Was he serious? His expression told me he was.
“Bennett.” I placed my hand over his heart. “You couldn’t have known.”
“Maybe not, but I should’ve expressed my concerns to Tristan. I talked to Liam about it. I talked to you about it. But I never talked to the one person who could’ve made a difference.”
“Come here.” I pulled him to me. “Come on.” I rolled us so that his head was pressed against my chest. “You can’t blame yourself. This is no one’s fault.”
“And here I thought telling Liam about us would be the hardest thing I’d face today. I’m sorry, Wren.”
“Don’t worry about all that. What matters is that we’re together. And when the time is right, we’ll tell my brother.”
I didn’t say it, but I knew that with everything going on, my brother and his friends needed one another now more than ever. I couldn’t cause Liam or Bennett more heartache. Not when I knew they were already hurting.
Chapter Twenty-Five
River was helping Wren and me clear the table after dinner when my phone rang. It was the number for the twenty-four-hour animal hospital. I gestured to Wren then went out to the back patio to take the call.
“This is Nash.” I cleared my throat.
“It’s Jim from the animal hospital. Your patient, Whisper, has died.”
I dropped my head. “Thank you for letting me know.”
I was sad—for Whisper and for Ms. Marcus. But deep down, I was relieved. While I wished I could’ve changed the outcome for Ms. Marcus and her cat, I knew I’d done everything I could.
Whisper had lived a good, long life. And I could make peace with the fact that it was her time.
But Tessa… Tessa was too young. For now, I had to be thankful that Tessa was still doing okay. And that the woman I loved was waiting inside for me.
After River went to bed, Wren tried to talk to me about it, but I blamed my mood on everything happening with Tessa and Tristan. I didn’t want to bring Wren down when we were already so sad. We talked about Tristan and Tessa for a while, about how the town was rallying around their family as the date for Tessa’s surgery approached.
And then Wren snuggled into my side, and we watchedTheGreat British Bake Off.By the end of the episode, I was exhausted and ready for bed. But apparently Wren had other ideas, climbing on my lap.
She massaged my temples, my head, my neck, and I melted into her touch. Letting myself get lost in her.
Later, after we’d made love, I fell asleep to the sound of her heartbeat. Her presence a balm to my soul.
Several days passed in a blur, anxiety digging in its claws the more time that passed. Wren and River were the light in the darkness, but even they couldn’t completely get me out of my current mood.
Wren and I had been spending more nights together, waiting until the last minute to sneak back to our respective rooms. I knew we were playing with fire, but I couldn’t find it in me to care. We were all too consumed with worry for Tessa, while trying to protect the kids from the dire reality of the circumstances.
