Mac doesn’t rise to my bait. He never does, even though he’s a ferocious competitor.
Master Chief: Meet you at your place in thirty.
He probably doesn’t need my address, since he’s visited more than once. But I text it to him anyway. Since I don’t have a guest room, Mac usually stays with Manny or Logan. I wonder if he’s staying with Manny because Logan and Emmy are taking a time-out from everyone. I also wonder if that’s a strategy Mac would agree with. Mac’s not a time-out kind of guy. But he was married a long time, even if it was to a woman who makes Cersei Lannister look benevolent, so he probably knows all the tricks.
I wonder if he knows a trick to get Cynnie to talk to me.
I hydrate while I wait for Mac, since it’s stupid to go running in August with as much alcohol as I’ve poured into my body over the last two days. I’ve mostly cleaned up since Cynnie left, butthere are still two blankets folded on the couch that I haven’t put away. Wishful thinking that she might come back.
I still don’t understand where I went wrong. Everything was so damn good for three days and then, bang. I feel like we fucking imploded and I still don’t know where I went so very wrong.
Mac’s arrival is as understated as the man himself. A simple text to let me know he’s at the front door. A quiet knock on my apartment door. Mac is never flashy. I let him in and wrap him in a hug, pounding on his back. Mac’s nearly twenty years older than I am. I’ve known him for coming up on a decade, but I swear he looks the same as the first day I saw him at Mayport Base. Strong, straight, square-faced; bright blue eyes that pick apart any excuse before you give it. His brown hair’s gone ashy and there’s more silver than brown in his beard now, but he’s the same man I’ve looked up to since the day we met.
He thumps me on the back before releasing me. “How are you, Maxie?”
“Good, sir. How was the trip up?”
Mac shrugs. “No peanuts. Didn’t there used to be peanuts on civvy flights?”
“Couldn’t tell you, sir.” I haven’t flown on a commercial flight in a very long time. My trips out of the country for Ness were all charters. “I thought you were coming up on your bike?”
Mac scrubs a hand through his crewcut. “’Fraid not. There’s always one more thing to take care of, isn’t there? Looks like I won’t be able to move up until next month. I’m looking at two apartments while I’m here, though.”
“Sorry to hear it, sir. If there’s anything you need me to do, just let me know.”
“Thanks, Maxie. I will.”
Mac’s already in his running gear, so after he fills up his water bottle from the filtered water in my fridge, we head out.One of the reasons we’ve always run together is that our strides are similar, and Mac keeps pace with me as I take him on a five-mile loop along the East River Greenway. We pass the Riis projects and I find myself telling Mac about Tyrone and Dakota.
Mac smiles fondly. “You’ve made a good place for yourself, Maxie,” he tells me.
I nod. I am in a good place now. Far better than when I got out. But there’s something missing. Hesitantly, I tell him about going to Logan’s playgroup, meeting Cynnie, and having her over for dinner.
“Sounds like the start of a good connection,” Mac says as we reach the half-way point and turn back. “Take it slow. No jumping into the sack until you’ve figured out what you both need.”
Fuck.
We run in silence for a minute.
Mac shoots me a side-eye. “You already slept with her, didn’t you?”
I nod. I want to protest that it just kind of happened, but it sounds flimsy even in my own head, and isn’t a Dom supposed to be in control? Did I blow it right from that first night?
“Well, can’t undo what’s been done,” Mac says pragmatically. “How are things going now?”
“She’s ghosted me. Disappeared.”
Mac grunts. “You let her get away with that?”
“I—” I guess I have. “I’ve reached out but I haven’t pushed when she didn’t respond. I don’t want to come off like a stalker.”
Mac wrinkles his chin as he considers. “I haven’t dated in a long time, Maxie. Not sure I’m the right fella to give you advice.”
“But? There’s a but in there. I can hear it.”
Mac chuckles then huffs until he regains his steady breathing. “But letting a subbie get away with not communicating with you? Big mistake. Show up at her damndoor if you have to. Take flowers, sure, but make her tell you what’s going on.”
“Just show up? What if she calls the police?”
