Page 21 of Rematch
These past few shifts have been Hell. From the moment I clock in to the one I clock out, I’m running non-stop all over the emergency room. With the school year settling in, we were getting hit with viral infections, broken limbs, and severe allergic reactions. Finding even five minutes to myself was an impossible task while I was here.
Every night, when I got home, I sat on the couch and crashed right there. When I woke up in the middle of the night, I was surprised to find myself in my room, tucked into my bed. Even more so when I padded downstairs and found a plate of food wrapped in the microwave waiting for me.
Sometimes I felt bad. I moved back to help take care of my dads. Not for them to continue taking care of me.
Tomorrow, on my off-day, I silently vowed to make them a nice dinner so we could all spend some quality time together. After flaking out on dinner all week, it’s the least I could do.
My eyelids threatened to fall lower and lower, affected by the gravity pulling the cart down.
I got off on the last level and walked through the main lobby towards the parking garage. As I passed through the halls ofthe garage, I suddenly heard my phone going off in my purse. I dug it out and saw Carter’s name at the top of the incoming call screen.
“Hey,” I greeted as I answered the call.
“Hey, how are you?” He asked. “I haven’t really heard from you over the past few days.”
“I’m sorry. It’s been a really rough week. I’ve been seeing your texts and mentally replying and then forgetting to actually type. That’s my fault.”
“No, it’s alright. I was just worried about you. That’s all.”
I smiled. “You’re sweet.”
“Are you around tonight? I’d really like to see you.”
“Um…” I paused as I debated my answer. I really didn’t feel like going out, but I wanted to honor his efforts to spend time with me. Sure, I could always invite Carter over and we could chill at my house. But, then he’d have to meet my dads and we’d be in my room and only one boy has ever really been in there. The alternative was going to his apartment, but I didn’t feel like stepping out of my comfort zone. If I was going to relax, then it was going to be in a space I felt comfortable in.
“We can do something lowkey if you want,” he said to fill in the silence. “I know you’ve been working all day. I was thinking we could go see that new horror movie that came out last week. The dine-in theater has a showing at nine-thirty.”
“That would actually be great. Pick me up at nine?”
“That’s perfect. I’ll see you then!”
I rushed through the traffic to make it home in time to take a shower and get myself together. As I did my hair and put on makeup, I sipped on a Red Bull, hoping it’d give me enough energy to make it through the night.
Seeing Carter’s smile when I walked outside made it all worth it. He opened his arms wide for a hug, and I didn’t hesitate togo into them. “I missed you,” he murmured into my hair as he squeezed me tight.
I didn’t bother to fight the smile blooming on my lips. “I missed you too,” I replied into his chest.
At the movie theater, Carter paid for our meal and sat close to me in the cushioned recliner chairs.
After we’d both finished eating, he moved the armrest separating the chairs and threw his arm over my shoulders.
I accepted the offer of his embrace and buried myself in the crook between his arm and chest. For the remainder of the movie, I let myself relish in the warmth of his body and the gentle beat of his heart. The pitter patter reminded me of rain tapping against the ceiling. The sound calmed my overstimulated nerves and helped me relax against him.
Again, I was reminded of how good of a man Carter was. His thoughtfulness, steadiness, and kindness were all attributes I could see myself loving someday.
Yet, there was still some hesitation pulling me back from allowing myself to see the vision in its entirety. Not because I didn’t want to, but because there were so many uncertainties in the future ahead. I couldn’t imagine a future without my father or our family’s restaurant or…
My thoughts trailed off as I realized I hadn’t truly let go of the picture I once held of my future. Though faded and old, it was still sitting in the back pocket of my mind, waiting to be taken out and admired.
Acknowledging it made me feel bad for Carter. I’ve already been keeping him at arm’s length with excuses about having too much going on to commit to a relationship. He deserved better than half of the woman I was offering. Maybe once the dust settled from dad’s rounds of chemo and changes in his business, I’d open up completely. Maybe sooner if the warm, secure squeeze in my chest whenever he was around continued.
“I felt you jump at a few of the scares,” I teased as we walked out the theater. “Don’t tell me you’re afraid of horror movies.”
“I wasn’t scared. I’m just not a fan of horror movies.”
“Then, why’d you pay to see it?”
“Because I remember you said you liked them,” he said. He threw his arm over my shoulders and pulled me close against him. “I thought it’d make you happy.”
