Page 47 of My Turkish Fling
I lay down on my side, leaning on my elbow, so I could see his face. “Why did you say you’re hard because of me?”
He turned to face me but avoided eye contact. “I saw you naked.It was an accident.”
My breath hitched as I tried to rearrange my thoughts. “When? How?”
Emir rubbed his forehead and blew out a deep breath before finally looking at me. “I was walking around the house earlier, to check the grounds, and I saw you coming out of the shower. I should have looked away… sooner. I’m sorry.”
My heart pounded in my ears. “It was you! The light I saw behind my window.”
He winced. “Probably. I’m sorry.”
“And I got so spooked that I finally just grabbed my pillow and ran to your room.” I didn’t mean it as criticism, only observation, but from the way he rubbed his face with his giant hand, groaning, I could see he took it that way.
“It wasn’t my plan,” he said. “I wasn’t trying to get you into my bed.”
I pushed that hand off his face, forcing him to look at me. “I know, Emir. I was already scared. I’m sure I would have ended up at your door either way.”
“I would have never tried anything.”
“I know.”
He swallowed and his voice turned darker. “But, now that you’re here, I can’t stop imagining all the things I want to do...” His hot breath grazed my shoulder as he leaned closer, his voice even darker. “Janie. If you have any doubts about this, you must leave. You’re not safe with me anymore.”
“I feel safe with you, Emir. And I want you. If we both want it,what’s the big deal?” I attempted a carefree smile, but I couldn’t shake the feeling he’d somehow transmitted into my brain, of this being a big deal. That if we slept together, everything would change.
He placed a kiss on my collar bone, letting out a frustrated growl. “I have a lot of self-control, Janie. At least I thought I did. Until I met you.”
“I’m going to take that as a compliment,” I whispered back. “Self-control is overrated, anyway.” I reached for his forehead, itching to touch that frown.
“You think?” He buried his face between the mattress and my hand, letting his fingers trace my shoulder, and slip down to my breast.
He wouldn’t meet my eyes, like he was embarrassed to be touching me this way, yet his hand kept moving, his thumb brushing across my nipple, rough and tender. Half of his beautiful face peeked from behind my hand, one brown eye begging for mercy.
I held still, terrified that he’d change his mind and pull away. I could feel his internal battle, yet I didn’t want him to stop. Part of me believed that if I could only make him lose control, something would shift. He’d begin smiling and singing on a regular basis and the world would fill with rainbows and unicorns.
I was an idiot. This man had set rules for himself. If he failed his own standards, he’d likely hate himself and hate me by extension. But my body had already decided, and it seemed my mind was happy to follow.
I wiggled my camisole over my head and threw it on the floor.“Touch me, Emir. I don’t want to be alone tonight.”
He stared at my breasts, mouth ajar. “You’re so beautiful, Janie. It’s impossible to look away.”
“Why would you look away?” Smiling at him, I peeled off the rest of the blanket, exposing his toned chest. “I’m not going to.”
I ran my fingers down the hairy middle, down the narrow trail leading to the hard-on that, if possible, was even bigger than before. Holding his gaze, I wrapped my fingers around his length, eliciting a rough gasp.
“Janie. I…”
I gave him a good stroke, watching his eyes roll back. “What? Do you want me to stop?”
“No. But you must. Or…”
He removed my hand to catch his breath, and rolled me onto my back, holding his weight over me, his face inches from mine. “Janie. I don’t do casual sex or casual relationships. So, if you want this, you’re mine. You don’t date other guys. I don’t look at other women.”
“You can look, frowny face.” I smiled, rubbing my thumb on his forehead. “But I won’t date anyone else. How could I? You scare them away.”
I tried to hold onto my smile, to keep my tone light, but he wouldn’t have it. Emir’s dark eyes bored down into my soul, simultaneously chilling and heating my blood. Hot. Cold. I couldn’t decide. It was the strangest feeling.
His hand tightened around my arm. “I’m ready. I want to take the risk, even if I can’t see the road ahead. I want to believe it’sstill there, and I’ll do everything I can to keep you.”
