Page 78 of Falling Madly
“She’ll find out. It’s in the news. But if I bring it up, it’ll sound like I’m trying to justify my actions. I never had any proof, only a feeling. I could still be wrong.”
Charlie frowned, staring at my phone. “This sounds suspicious.”
“Even so, I should have never tried to control who she works with. I should have been there, keeping an eye on that guy. Protecting her.”
“But what if he killed this lady? What if he’s killed before? That missing tourist… it could have been Teresa!”
A shiver ran through me. I picked up the milk jug and turned on the steamer, letting my fingers rest on the warming metal.
“I don’t care about being right. I want to be right forher.”
“You are! If she doesn’t see it, it’s her loss.”
“In which case… Let me guess… Ye want me to move on?” I gave him a wry smile.
Charlie smiled apologetically. “Disagreeing with your therapist seems like a stupid move.”
I handed him the coffee and offered him the remaining waffle. “Thanks. I’ll save it for Bess,” he said.
Along with the discounted Valentine’s Day cookies, they’d picked up smoothies and sandwiches, spreading them across the counter.
“She doesn’t love me,” I said quietly, starting another coffee. “She’s never been in love.”
Charlie frowned. “Does she even know what it’s like?”
“I don’t know, and now I’m wondering if I know that either. I thought it was this horrible feeling I have… like nothing makes sense without her. That I’d rather have her angry wi’ me than not have her in my life. I don’t want to imagine my life without her. Maybe I shouldn’t have told her that.”
Charlie hung his head. “No! You didn’t really say that to her, did you?”
I grimaced. “Well, kind of.”
He groaned. “You’ve been obsessing over her for months. She’s not going to be on the same page. She needs time to catch up.”
“I know! I’m not expecting her to be where I am. Maybe she thinks I am, but I’m not. But it’s hard to not feel disappointed when, you know…”
Charlie let out a long sigh. “I know.”
“She wanted to sleep next to me, maybe not totally out of pity. Wasnae about sex, either.” I pushed the button and watched coffee drip. “The sex is amazing, though.”
Charlie nodded. “The way she was looking at you… she’s warmed up a lot. Give her time. And she needs to know about Gavin. You could have saved her from getting murdered. If it was me, I’d love you for that.”
“Aw, cheers, pal.” I rolled my eyes. “They’ve no’ even found a body yet. I don’t want to jump to conclusions.”
Charlie gave me a long, appraising look. “You used to trust your instincts, man. What happened?”
My instincts led me to lose the love of my life, that’s what happened,I thought with painful clarity. If Charlie was right and I had another chance with her, I wouldn’t let any gut reactions ruin it.
It was time to take deep breaths and chill the fuck out. I’d be so chill she’d think she was dating a snowman.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Teresa
I’d never seen that many people in Cozy Creek. In my youth, the sled contest had been a small event with a handful of dedicated spectators drinking lukewarm cider and freezing their toes off, waiting to witness one entertaining crash.
The waiting was still very much part of the deal, but the organizers had bagged some major sponsors. Large logos decorated the gazebos set up to serve not just hot drinks but hotdogs and pizza rolls. With a stage built of pallets and “Eye of the Tiger” blasting from wardrobe-sized loudspeakers, there was now a sports event vibe. Progress, I guess.
Trevor grabbed my hand. “There!” He pointed to the top of the hill, where our purple cardboard car stood by a flagpole.
