Page 65 of The Holiday Grump
“Oh my God.” He sucked in sharp breaths. “Oh my God.”
I’d never done anything this brazen. I’d reached peak embarrassment, and the next step would probably be spontaneous combustion. But he made me brave. I felt so safe with him that I could say and do unimaginable things. Playful, dangerous things.
Fredrik’s finger flexed, and he groaned. “You play dirty, Noelle.”
“I play to win.”
I waited with bated breath as he held still, a battle raging behind his eyes. I wanted this, but I didn’t know if he really wanted me. Maybe he just wanted to get through this moment of weakness without making a mistake.
I released his wrist, worried that I was forcing him. His fingers remained, hovering over the most sensitive part of me, not touching. He couldn’t take the leap.
Releasing a deep sigh, I turned to open the sauna door.
“Where do you think you’re going?” His low growl stopped me cold.
He closed the sauna door and backed me against it, trapping me between his arms. My body pressed on the warm glass, and the bundle of birch leaves hit the floor with a wetthud. “I told you this is a dangerous game. You don’t get to back out anymore.”
“Why would I?” I batted my eyelashes innocently as desire pooled through me.
The deep, resonant rumble of his voice shot right into my core. “If you want me to be a gentleman, you need to tell me right now. Because I’m not sure I can access that part of myself anymore.”
“I like you like this,” I said breathlessly. “I like you a little out of control.”
He dove for my neck, kissing my collarbone, then dragged his tongue down to my breasts. “You’re so perfect,” he mumbled before sucking in a nipple.
I’d done it. I’d tapped into the primal part of this man, and it was even better than I’d imagined. He trailed hot kisses down my cool skin, running his hands down my body, exploring every bit of me like he’d never seen anything like it. Worshipping every curve and dip along my skin.
“I’m on the pill,” I whispered as he returned to kiss my lips. “I’ve been tested.”
“Me too,” he said. “A long time ago. It’s been a long time.”
“Too long,” I said. “Come here.”
He aligned the tip of his erection at my opening but held there, moving back and forth ever so slightly. Sparks erupted behind my eyelids. When he pulled away, I moaned. “No. Don’t turn into a gentleman now. It’s too late.”
His mouth curved. “I just want to do this right.” He grabbed my waist, lifting me to sit on a nearby bench. “Can I taste you?”
I anchored my toes on the wood floor and my fingersaround the edge of the seat, letting my legs fall open as he fell onto his knees, diving between them. His tongue worked magic, rhythmic and hungry. Circling and teasing, soft and reverent. I wanted to hold back until I saw him lose control, but I couldn’t. He’d decided to take care of me, so that was what he did. Gently. Patiently. Like he was still a gentleman who couldn’t be anything else.
The scent of birch leaves and hot wood lingered in the air, mixing with something sweet and primal rising from us. He cupped my thighs, holding me in place between his mouth and the wooden seat, and I felt my release building. It was disorienting and beautiful, like too many flavors dancing on your tongue all at once. With every touch, I was transported further from the confusing reality, deeper into a space beyond where nothing else existed. Only me and him, and this moment.
It was a moment I’d barely been brave enough to imagine. Fredrik between my legs, devouring me. How was he so good at this? So precise and careful, yet determined, responding to every little sound I made, making me squirm, then finally applying more pressure, growling like an animal.
I wasn’t sure what sent me over the edge, but the release hit me with such force I nearly fell off the bench, every muscle contracting as I rode the wave, finally collapsing forward against his shoulder. It felt so good. So raw. So unfiltered.
When I came to my senses, I reached for him. “I need you.”
He pulled me to my feet and against his chest. “What do you want?”
I reached to open the sauna door, breathing in the hot, dry heat. The bottom step was a freestanding stool, so I pushed it aside to make room and hopped onto the middle bench. It wasn’t too hot with the door open, and I was sitting at just the right height. “I need you here, Fredrik.”
As he stepped in, I spread my thighs, gasping at the size of him.
He aligned himself between my legs, and I felt the tip of him brush my thigh. “Are you sure?”
I wrapped my fingers around him, pulling him closer. “You need this too. Trust me.”
When he thrust inside me, I gasped out loud. He filled me so perfectly, so tightly, leaving no room for movement or questions. We held there for a while, breathing heavily, suspended in that sweet ache. He wrapped his palms around me and moved a little. “Does it hurt?”
