Page 27 of Merry Mayhem
And every guy looks good in a uniform.
I’m notactuallyattracted to him.
I just like him because he was very kind to my grandfather.
And he’s mysister’s boyfriend.
Ishouldlike my sister’s boyfriend. That’s okay. It’s good, even.
But I shouldnotget a hot swirling sensation in my belly when he laughs.
I scrub the side of the pan, enjoying the feel of the friction and the heat of the water. It stings the hangnail I have on my middle finger, and I welcome that as well. I deserve that.You should not lust after the guy your sister is dating.
So…I’ll just ignore the warm swirly feelings he causes.Hot, they are definitely hot, swirly feelings.Ugh. I’ll ignoreallthe freaking feelings he causes. We’re going to be partners for Merry Mayhem. That’s it. I’ll just be grateful I’m not Sam’s partner in Violet’s place.
Oh, grateful? That’s what you’re going to feel? Really?
I scrub harder.
So what if Josh is respectful of my grandfathers and didn’t even blink about them being gay? Or that he’s kind to mydaughter. Or that he also didn’t seem to think twice about me being a single mom and didn’t ask about Ruth’s dad, even in a roundabout way. He’s taken everything in stride. He’s been charming and seems fully comfortable with my parents.
But so what? So what if, as a firefighter and paramedic, he’s probably seen a lot of shit, people at their worst, some strange, not great circumstances, and is programmed to help, rather than judge? Unlike Sam, who is a finance bro and hangs out exclusively with other finance bros and not only judges people down on their luck, but also judges people who drive cars that are more than three years old.
And so what if Josh is genuine and warm and even…sweet? I guess that’s the word.
Sweet is good. Violet deserves sweet. She deserves to see a major contrast to what she had and know that there are other options out there. She also deserves someone who loves her family.
We all do.
I’m not heartbroken that my family thought Sam would be a part of us and then ended up breaking up with all of us. I’m heartbroken that Sam never really loved my family the way he should have.
I was glad when they broke up. I didn’t like seeing my sister upset, of course, but I haven’t missed Sam. I was glad to hear he had a new girlfriend. Hopefully, that will keep him the fuck away from Violet while he’s in town.
The way Josh shared the story about how he followed a woman from Nebraska all the way to Louisiana shows that he’s far more romantic than Sam ever was. The way Josh admitted that he tends to go overboard at times shows he’s at least a little self-aware. The fact that he seemed a little sad and even embarrassed that the woman chose another man over him showed that he’s got some humility. He didn’t seem angry oreven jealous. He seems a little heartbroken, which is…nice. It’s nice to think he’s got a heart and cares about this woman, but also respects that she chose someone else and moved on.
Plus…he’s really hot.
I squirt more soap into the pan and scrub harder.
It doesn’t need it, but I do.
It’s okay to think my sister’s boyfriend is a good guy, but is it okay to think he’s hot?
Maybe. It’s maybe just an objective fact, and my observing it is just…something anyone would do.
I need to talk to my girlfriends. I need them to see Josh and see if they also think he’s hot.
I look around for my phone. It’s lying on the counter several feet away. I look down at my sudsy hands. Dammit.
I need to text Andi and Nora and let them know they have an extra assignment tonight at the Merry Mayhem kick-off event. Nora will definitely be there. It’s her event after all. But I need to be sure my grumpy, divorced friend Anderson will show up. She usually does for Nora’s stuff, but all this holiday craziness makes her roll her eyes extra hard.
I rinse my hands and grab the faucet sprayer to rinse the pot.
The hose reminds me that Josh is a firefighter.
Firefighters are automatically hot. It’s not just me. I’m certain Nora and Andi will agree. Firefighters are freaking heroes. They’re willing to run into burning buildings to save other people, for fuck’s sake. That’s definitely sexy.
And he’s willing to do Merry Mayhem to help Violet save face in front of Sam.
