Page 106 of Perfectly Complicated
“Why don’t you help her?” Tate suggests.
“I would, except I know Janie won’t accept it.”
“So you’re just going to let him threaten her?” Leo asks with a frown.
“Absolutely not. I’m trying to figure out how I can protect her and Aria. He’s trying to get dirt on me so he can stack evidence against her.”
“That doesn’t make sense,” Brax says, sitting next to me. “Janie would do anything for her daughter.”
“I know, but that doesn’t mean the courts will see it that way,” I shoot back. “And it doesn’t solve the problem that I’m gone half the time. Or that I come from a dysfunctional home with an alcoholic father. I’ve never even had a serious relationship, let alone been responsible for a child.”
I shake my head, the doubts piling up in my head. “What do I know about being a dad? I’ve been a bachelor my entire adult life.”
“Doesn’t disqualify you,” Brax says, cracking open a can of sparkling water.
“Maybe not in the world’s eyes, but in the eyes ofthe law?” I huff out a humorless laugh. “Nick’s lawyers will tear me apart when they find out about my father.”
The room goes quiet. They know pieces of my story, but not everything.
“You’re not him,” Tate says.
“I’ve told myself that.” Then I shake my head, running through the questions that haunt me. “But what if I end up hurting them? I don’t know if I can be a good father. If Nick screws up, he’s still her dad. But if I screw up, I might be the reason she loses Aria.”
“But he cheated on her, then failed to pay child support,” Brax argues. “You’ve already proved yourself.”
“I know, but what if I make a mistake? Something that would call her full custody into question?” I lean back in my chair, closing my eyes. “I’d never forgive myself.”
Brax freezes, his can halfway to his mouth. “So you’re just going to do what? Walk away?”
“I’m not walking away. I’m trying to protect her.”
Leo leans forward, rolling the bottle between his fingers. “You’re telling yourself that Janie can fight Nick on her own—and that she wants to.”
“I don’t see why it has to be one or the other,” Tate points out. “What if you could be part of their livesandhelp her fight this? Maybe even become Aria’s father. It’s not unrealistic.”
“Maybe eventually. But right now Nick’s looking for any excuse to make Janie’s life harder.”
We sit in silence for a while. Leo grabs me a drink, and I take it even though I’m not in the mood. Brax pushes the plate of crackers toward me, but I can’t eat either. My stomach is in knots.
“You really think leaving is the answer?” Tate asks, picking up a cracker.
“I think it buys her time,” I say. “She can sort out the custody issues without Nick using our relationship against her.”
Leo pushes his drink away. “You’re assuming you’re the problem.”
“I AM the problem!” The words burst out of me. “Listen, I don’t want to do this. Especially after I told her I want to spend the rest of my life with her. But I don’t know what else to do. Every option ends with her getting hurt.”
Tate leans forward. “So what’s your actual plan here?”
“Move back to my condo. Keep some distance until the custody situation settles.” I stare at the bottle in my hands. “Look, I’m not giving up on her. I’m just giving her space to deal with Nick without me making it worse.”
“And the pageant?” Tate asks.
“I’ll be there. I’m not breaking my promise to her.”
The guys exchange glances, and I get the feeling they’re not convinced that giving her space is the right call. But they don’t push anymore. They let me sit there, working through it in my head because they know that’s what I need.
“You know she’s going to fight you on this,” Leo tells me.
