Page 77 of Perfectly Complicated
Rourke is dozing in an armchair across the room, shirtless—he must have gotten warm holding her—with Aria sleeping on his chest. His hand spreads across her tiny back, and for the first time all day, her little face iscontent.
I cross the room and gently press my palm to her forehead. Her skin is cool to the touch.
For a moment, I stare at them in amazement. This man—this Christmas-hating hockey player—is cradling my baby girl.
He looks like he was born for this. And that’s very inconvenient for my heart.
“Hey,” he whispers, his voice rough as he rubs an eye. “Her fever broke about an hour ago. She’s been sleeping like this, so I didn’t want to move her.”
“You’ve been holding her this whole time?”
“Yeah.” He looks down at Aria, then back at me. “I didn’t mind.”
I put a hand to my mouth, trying to keep from losing it. Why does this wreck me in the best possible way?
“Janie,” he says. “Are you okay?”
“Yes.” I blink rapidly. “I’ve never been more okay in my life.”
“Good. Because Aria’s a fighter.” He strokes her hair. “Just like her mom.”
No amount of blinking is going to hold back the waterworks now.
“I’m sorry.” My voice is thick with emotion. “I’m glad you showed up.”
He shakes his head. “It was nothing.”
“It waseverything,Rourke,” I correct him.
“She’s important to me.” He hesitates. “You both are.”
I settle on the arm of his chair, close enough that I brush against his bruised shoulder. “You took a nasty hit tonight. You should be sleeping in bed, not sitting here holding a baby.”
His brow furrows. “How did you know about the hit?”
This is it—the moment when I either keep pretending or let him see the truth I’ve been hiding. “I watched the game.”
He lifts an eyebrow. “How much did you see?”
“The entire thing.” I pause. “I watch all of them. I tell myself it’s on for the background noise, but…” I meet his eyes in the dim light. “I hold my breath every time someone hits you. I cheer when you score. I even know the names of everyone on the team now.”
He doesn’t move. Doesn’t say anything.
“When you went down tonight and didn’t get up right away…” I bite my lip. “I thought my heart was going to stop. And that’s when I knew.”
“What?”
“That I’m completely, hopelessly falling for you…despite trying not to.”
“Janie…”
I put my hand up to stop him. “Let me finish, Rourke. Because if I don’t say it now, I might never be brave enough to tell you the truth.” I pause. “I know my life is complicated. I know I come with a baby and baggage that could fill a jumbo jet. But I can’t pretend anymore that these feelings don’t exist. I love everything you bring to our lives. I love that you sing lullabies and drive to pharmacies at midnight and make my daughter and me giggle. I love that you see us as a family when I’m still learning how to function as one.”
For a beat, all I can hear is Aria’s soft breathing.
“I’ve been waiting for you to say that,” he says, “because I fell for you the night I watched you sleep in my arms.”
I tilt my head. “Which time?”
