Page 77 of Love Beyond Repair
I pull the book out and flip it open to the first page. A photo of Ben and I as kids at high school at a random school dance. The next page has an image of a school art project I received an award for. Then come prom photos, filled with us and our group of friends.
With each page, my life unfolds. Memories of Ben and me together, then times when we were apart. Liam’s earlylife, from a baby to the boy he is today, decorates the pages. And the time we’ve all had together these past few years.
“How did you?” I stutter, trying to comprehend how he managed to compile it all. Memory after memory. Some happy, some sad, some bittersweet. But every one important in the patchwork of my life.
“Amy. Kelsey. School friends…” He shrugs. “I wanted you to have something to look back at and see how far you’ve come.”
“It’s beautiful.” Sharp emotion catches in my throat as tears sting my eyes. It’s not pain exactly, but truth. Truth that we know where we’re headed, and this was something he could do for me. “Perfect for now, and for Liam—when I’m…” My words disappear. We both know we’re on borrowed time, but it’s time we’ll cherish until we can’t.
I’m lost in the pages when I realize he’s no longer sitting beside me. When I glance up, Ben is on one knee, ring box open, and a stunning antique diamond ring glints under the summer sun.
“Marry me,” he whispers, his voice thick.
“Ben, I…”
“I bought this for you when I ruined everything. After Spain, the first time, I wanted to ask you. But then it all happened. I messed it up. Do me the honor of making me the happiest man now and being my wife.”
My eyes flick from him to the ring, to the kids playing oblivious in the sea. Well, all except Savannah, who’s watching us, an enormous grin on her face.
“I’m scared that we won’t have any time,” I say, my voice cracking.
“No one has forever, Bex. But we have now. And I’ll take that.” Tears stream down my cheeks, my head nodding, but no words coming out. “Is that a yes?” he prompts.
“Yes.”
He takes my hand, sliding the ring onto my finger. His large hand wraps around my smaller one as he leans in, kissing me softly.
“It looks perfect, like I always knew it would,” he says.
There’s a gaggle of screams and shouts as the children race across the beach, each one grabbing one of us into a hug. The six of us fall onto the sand, wrapped in a tangle of bodies.
“She said yes,” Ben shouts, punching the air, and they all erupt in cheers. When we all sit up, smiles are plastered on faces all round.
“When’s the wedding?” Rose asks. “And do I need to wear a dress? I don’t like pink.”
We all laugh, then I say, “I want to get married as soon as possible.”
And for the first time in a long time, I stop thinking about the end, and start imagining the days still to come.
Chapter thirty-nine
August 2017
Ben
The late afternoon sun beats down on my face. I’m lying back on the grass, eyes closed, listening to the kids playing soccer. Bex is snuggled up beside me. She hasn’t been so well this last week, but she was determined to come along to our family picnic before school restarts.
Time passes too quickly.
I still can’t believe that Ollie and Liam are starting high school. They’ve both grown considerably over the summer and need full wardrobes of new clothes again. Ollie’s slightly taller, but they remain unnervingly similar in looks. It’s hard to believe they have different mothers.
They’re inseparable as friends. I’ve been summoned to the headmaster more than once for them tag-teaming bullies. I told him I’m proud they’re standing up for what matters. I suggested to school that they should start reprimanding the criminals, not just the vigilantes.
Bex mumbles in her sleep. She drifted off a while ago. Whenever or wherever she sleeps, I’m grateful for it. Her treatment is severe now, and she suffers from headaches most days.
Eamon took over her case file as soon as she received the terminal diagnosis. He was the only doctor I trusted with her ongoing care. The focus is on pain management.
All the children dote on her. She’s forged fantastic relationships with both my daughters, taking interest in their hobbies and pursuits. It’s not unusual for me to find the three of them locked in the girls’ room, trying on random outfits or painting each other’s nails.
