Page 64 of The Shell Collector
Maeve gave him a nod. “I know Paul. That was quite an entrance.”
“Not intentional. I promise.”
Amanda shook her head, then explained to Maeve. “Between the two of them, Paul and Jack, Paul was always the quiet one. They were best friends when I met them.”
Paul looked concerned. “Hailey, are you okay? Jesse, do you remember me?”
Jesse shook his head.
Amanda held out her hand. “Come here, Jesse.” She took her son’s hand in her own, then turned back to Maeve. “There was a time when the three of us—Paul, Jack, and me—were always together. We’ve shared a lot of memories.”
“We have.”
“You looked like Jack jogging up that beach.” She lifted her other hand, gracefully outlining the shape she could stillsee so vividly in her mind. “The silhouette. The way youmove. I mean, the sun was behind you, but yeah. I thought…I mean, for a second…” She stood there blinking, not a single word coming to her, just that image. So much like Jack.
Maeve broke the silence. “Would you two like to catch up? I could take the kids back to my house or sit with them at yours. I’d be happy to do that. Hailey and Jesse, would you like to spend some time with me so your momma can visit with Paul?”
Hailey walked from Amanda to Maeve, never turning her back on Paul, as if she thought he might disappear. “Yes ma’am.” She took Maeve’s hand and then grabbed Jesse’s with her other.
“Thank you, Maeve.” She let go of Jesse’s grip. “Take them to our house. It’s closer. They can show you where everything is. I promise we won’t be long.”
“You take what time you need. We’ll make do. I bet they have a thousand things to show me.”
Amanda watched Maeve walk Hailey and Jesse over the dune. As soon as they cleared it, she sobbed. “I don’t know what I’d have done if something happened to Hailey.”
Paul lifted her into his arms. “It’s okay. Everyone is all right. Come on. I’m sorry. I had no idea. Wow. You were the last person I ever expected to see again.”
His shoulder bore the same tattoo that had been on Jack’s shoulder. She’d always hated that he’d marked his body like that, but it was a Marine thing. Something she’d never understand or be a part of, but it made Jack the man he was, and she had loved every single thing about him. And he and Paul had done it all together. Two of a kind.
He guided her to the sand. “Sit down.” His voice was so calming.
“No, I have some water and a beach blanket over here.” She led him to their pile of stuff and sat. She took out two bottles and handed him one. “I can’t believe you’re here.”
“I’m sorry I’m not Jack.”
“Stop.” It was hard to look at him again. They’d once been so close. He was like the other half of Jack. “Don’t say that.”
“I’ve asked a million times why I came back and he didn’t. He had you, the kids, so much to come home to. I had nothing. It wasn’t fair.”
“No one ever promised us fair. There’s not an answer to why. It took me a long time to accept that.”
“Poor Hailey.”
“We know he’s not coming back. It was high hopes or dreams, adrenaline that got the best of us in the shadows. It’s nothing you did.”
He sat next to her and pulled his sunglasses from his face. He ran his hand over his eyes and then set his glasses on his knee. “When I found out that Jack died over there…” A glazed look of despair shadowed his expression. “If I hadn’t taken the opportunity to work with the MP dogs, I’d have been there with him. That was the plan when we went in. That we’d be together.” He clenched his fist.
“You couldn’t have known what would happen.”
He wore the pain in his blue eyes.
“It was a promise. I promised you on your wedding day I wouldn’t let anything happen to him.”
“Stop. He made his own decisions, and he could take care of himself. He could’ve taken a different assignment too. But he decided a six-month deployment was best. And if you’d been there with him, you’d have probably not come back either.”
“Better than being back without him.” He dropped his chin to his chest. “I regret it every day.”
“I feel that too. It’s hard to shake.” Her lips trembled, making the words feel awkward. “Grief is so powerful. It’ll drag you under.”
