Page 76 of The Wedding Ranch
“Spending time with you has been real nice.”
“I think so too. We all have our baggage, Ryder. It makes us who we are. Sometimes it comes out in more positive ways than others, but it’s all according to His plan. It’s hard to trust that sometimes.”
“It sure is.” The words drew out, edged with the reality of pain.
It was easier to say than to live that way. Who was she to be preaching like that? It wasn’t her place to judge Jeff, and yet even now she clung to that anger toward him, so much so that it impacted her relationship with her parents. Jeff struggled with his demons. Addiction, and the lying and stealing. He’d hurt so many people.
When the day came, and they were told he was dead, it had shattered her parents. For her, she’d felt the loss of her brother years before that day. They just made it official.
“Some people’s baggage is more like designer luggage,” she said. “Mine’s like a trash bag full of a mishmash of other people’s problems I can’t seem to let go of. I’m working on figuring out how to deal with that.”
“You don’t seem like you have a problem in the world,” he said.
“For the record, you don’t either. You’re not hard to be around. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you.”
“You’re a good listener.” He stopped as if he had more to say. “I don’t ever talk about this, but I’m glad you know. If I react ina way that doesn’t make sense sometimes, maybe this will help you understand why.”
She waited, not wanting to interrupt him, and not really knowing what to say even if he had finished. The thought of a loss that great tumbled in her mind, landing heavy on her heart. Other people’s stories had a way of putting your own problems into perspective. When Jeff died, it tore her parents apart. Even now, all these years later, they were still broken. But losing a wife and a child at the same time?
He’d dropped his focus to the table. “It was…”
“Devastating,” she said quietly.
“Yes.” He lifted his gaze to hold hers. “You know in seven years’ time I’ve had a lot of people say a lot of things when they find out about Valerie and Ronnie Dwayne, and never has it brought me any comfort, but yes, devastating is exactly what it was. Youdounderstand.”
“I’d never claim to understand that kind of loss.” What more could she say? She knew drunk drivers killed. “That kind of accident is heartbreaking.”
“It wasn’t an accident.” His jaw set. “An accident is an event that happens by chance. This was no accident. This was a wreck. It destroyed my entire life. I—” He raised his hand, stopping mid-sentence. “I’m sorry. I thought I could talk about this, but I…” He stood to leave.
“I’ll be right here if you want to come back.” Her heart ached for him.
His chest heaved, a pained smile pulling across his face. “You are really something. I mean that in the nicest way.”
She could see his pain, feel it in her core. “We don’t have to ever talk about this again.”
He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. She thought he might actually sit back down, but then he walked off.
How does someone ever find themselves again after something like that?
She’d been cheated on. It had felt like the end of the world. In contrast to what Ryder had been dealt, it was nothing. A blip on the radar. A zit on date night. Something that would heal.
Perspective.
She’d just received a heaping dose of it.
Chapter Twenty-two
Ryder barely slept the night following the Tuggle wedding. His dreams twisted the past and the present together in weird scenarios, but one thing he couldn’t shake the next morning was the feeling he’d had when he heard about how and why Cody and Kasey had created the PT Foundation. He’d come home and gone online to research their story about how putting their attention on the foundation had changed their lives and helped others.
He sat out under the awning at the Rest Stop, realizing he’d been missing out on the peace that being near the creek brought over him. He thought more clearly down here.
He was antsy to talk to Diane, Reece, and Ross about what was consuming his thoughts since last night, but knew they deserved some extra sleep after all the work that had gone into the celebrity wedding. From here he’d heard the music playing late into the night.
Ryder tacked up Thunder and rode to the family cemetery.There he knelt in grateful prayer for the love he’d shared with Valerie and Ronnie Dwayne, which still filled his heart.
The Tuggles were to have left last night after the reception, so he’d be back in his house sometime today. He wished now he hadn’t made such a big deal of them cleaning the place up. Hopefully, it wouldn’t take too long. He rode over to the barn to pass the time.
It was long after that Ryder’s phone chirped with a text from Ross.We’re all at Mom’s eating a late breakfast. Come on over.
