Page 55 of Second Dance
GILLIAN
The five of us gathered around the patio dining table to eat dinner. Temperatures had quickly cooled once the sun set, but Alex turned on several outdoor heaters, making it quite pleasant despite my sleeveless dress. Sonya brought out a heap of homemade potato salad, steaming ears of corn dripping with butter, and fresh rolls straight out of the oven. As promised, Alex’s chicken had been cooked perfectly.
“Thank you, Sonya,” I said as I unfolded a perfectly ironed linen napkin. “This looks wonderful.”
“It’s my pleasure, Miss Gillian. I enjoy cooking for a family now that my children are all grown up,” Sonya said.
“Leave the dishes to us,” Alex said.
“Oh, dear me, no,” Sonya said. “I’ll be inside if you need anything at all.”
After she left, I turned to Alex. “Does she live here with you?”
He nodded. “Yes. She lives in an apartment over the detached garage.”
“We used to have Maya,” Bella said. “But she didn’t want to move away from her family.”
“Sonya’s been with us since we came to Willet Cove,” Alex said. “We’re quite attached to her.”
“She seems to feel the same way about all of you,” I said.
“At first we missed Maya,” Peter said. “She’d been with us for a long time.”
“Our mom loved Maya,” Bella said. “She took care of Mom when she was sick.”
“I’m sorry about your mom,” Grace said, in that innocent, sweet way she had. My child had a big heart, even if sometimes it overwhelmed her and everyone around her. She felt everything so deeply and intensely. Like me.
“I don’t understand why everyone says that,” Bella said. “It’s not like it’s anyone’s fault that she died. Except God’s.”
“It’s just a way to express condolences,” Peter said, glancing over at his father.
Bella shook her head, looking stubborn and sullen. “At the memorial, ladies from church told me God had a plan and that everything happens for a reason and my mom was in a better place. I wanted to punch them.”
Grace giggled. From nerves or genuine humor? I wasn’t sure.
Bella’s eyes flashed, but then she grinned. “I’m serious. I wanted to punch them right in the nose.”
“Bella, that’s enough,” Alex said.
“I mean, I didn’t punch them, obviously,” Bella said. “Mom would’ve been mortified if I’d done something like that at her funeral.”
“Bella, really?” Peter mumbled, the tips of his ears growing pink.
“It’s all right,” I said. “I felt the same way when my sister died. People telling me she was in a better place nearly provoked a streak of violence in me too.”
“It did?” Grace asked, looking shocked. “I’ve never heard you say anything like that.”
“Grief makes people feel strange things,” I said. “You wake up feeling like a different person than you were before you lost them.”
“Yeah, it’s true,” Peter said, looking up from his plate.
“And things you once liked or enjoyed seem stupid,” I said.
“Like what?” Grace asked.
“I used to watch this reality show about these rich women in New York,” I said. “I always found it funny and entertaining. But one day, about two months after I lost my sister, I was folding laundry and turned it on just as a distraction. And one of the stars had some crisis that wasn’t really a crisis and I got so mad I wanted to shout at the television about people with real problems. All their pettiness and vapidness seemed so clear to me. I never watched it again.”
“It must have been scary to suddenly have a baby,” Bella said.
