Page 59 of Certified Pressure 4
Holding my grandson gave me this proud feeling I couldn’t quite describe. His little hand rested against my shoulder while I rocked him, and for a moment, everything felt still. I could feel God’s grace in the room, and the way peace always found its way to me whenever my child or grandchildren were near. Prestyn was so perfect, and every time I looked at him, I saw pieces of Pressure I used to pray I’d see one day. It was the softer side that only came out when his heart was full.
I heard the front door open, and that familiar, deep voice followed. “Ma.”
I smiled before I even turned around. “In here, baby.”
Pressure walked into the room, dressed down in all black. Even with everything he’d been through, he still carried himselflike he was untouchable. But I could always see through it because that was my son.
He came closer, kissing my cheek before scooping Prestyn into his arms. The way he looked at his child made me want to cry. “You alright?” I asked.
He nodded. “Yeah, Ma. I’m good.”
I studied him for a moment because I could tell when something was sitting heavy on his spirit. “You sure?”
He nodded again, but his eyes said otherwise. “Yeah. Just been processin’ some things.”
I smiled faintly. “I can imagine. You’ve had a lot going on, but I’m proud of you, Pressure. Truly.”
He looked at me like he wasn’t expecting that. “For what?”
“For growing into the man I always knew you would be,” I told him. “You’ve done a lot of things I may not have agreed with, but I can’t deny the way you’ve turned things around. You’re being a father, a provider, and now you’re about to be a husband. That’s something to be proud of.”
He lowered his gaze for a second, his lips curving just slightly. “It feel good, Ma. I feel like I’m aligned, for real, like everything finally fallin’ where it’s supposed to.”
I nodded. “That’s what happens when you start walking in purpose instead of pride.”
He laughed under his breath. “You always gotta give a lil’ sermon, huh?”
I smirked. “That’s my job, son. And as long as I’m breathing, you’re never too old for one.”
He sat down beside me, holding Prestyn close. For a while, we just sat there in silence.
“I found her.”
Pressure’s head lifted slowly, and I could see the tension in his eyes before he even opened his mouth. “Found who?” he asked, though we both knew.
“Kashmere,” I said calmly. “She’s in Halo Key.”
He didn’t speak right away. His fingers rubbed over his beard, and he looked away like he needed a second to process what I said. “You serious?”
“I wouldn’t have brought it up if I wasn’t,” I replied softly. “She’s been there for a while. Hiding under another name.”
He exhaled, sitting back on the couch. “Ma…” He paused for a moment, his voice low. “I don’t want you to kill her.”
I looked at him carefully, not surprised by his words. “I figured that,” I said.
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “She did what she did, and yeah, I’ll never forget that. But I don’t wanna carry that hate no more. I’m tired of it. I got Pluto, I got my kids, and I’m finally happy. I just wanna move forward. I don’t want this hangin’ over me no more.”
I nodded slowly, studying his face. “You have a good heart, Pressure. Maybe too good sometimes, but that’s what makes you my son.”
He glanced at me again, his voice lower now. “I just want it to be done, Ma. No more blood. No more revenge.”
I could feel the weight of his words, the way they came from somewhere deep. I wasn’t angry with him for feeling that way. In fact, I understood it. My son had seen enough darkness for a lifetime, and if forgiveness brought him peace, then I couldn’t stand in his way.
Still, the woman in me hadn’t forgotten. Kashmere had done something unforgivable. As Pressure’s mother, I refused to let her be that very thing hanging over his head.
“I hear you,” I told him softly. “And I’m not mad at you for feeling that way. It just reminds me that I raised you with compassion.”
He stood up, leaning over to kiss my forehead. “I love you, Ma.”
