Page 89 of Certified Pressure 4
I leaned against the wall, silent for a second. Part of me got why she was panickin’. She was a mess, but she was human. I also knew my mama was hell. Still, I couldn’t feel sorry for her. “You keep talkin’ like you the victim,” I said. “You shot me, Kash. You damn near killed me. Then you took my money, my jewelry, and my jet like I wasn’t gon’ find out. You turned my staff against me. You really think you can just call and cry your way out of that?”
“I didn’t steal from you. I swear on my baby’s soul,” she said quick. “I just ran. I had to.”
I shook my head and tugged at my beard. “You really still lyin’? That’s what’s crazy about you. Even when you beggin’ for yo’ fuckin’ life, you can’t tell the truth.”
“I did what I had to do,” she snapped back. “You led me on, Pressure. You made me think I was your everything, and then you left me for her. You broke me.”
“Yeah, well, breakin’ you didn’t mean you had to try and bury me,” I said. “You pulled that trigger, not me.”
“But you didn’t die though,” she whispered. “And now we both movin’ on, so I just want peace. I wanna be free, and I feel like you the only one who can make that happen.”
I blinked slow, starin’ out the window of the shop. That entitlement in her voice hit a nerve. She really believed I owed her somethin’. “You called me from a blocked number talkin’ about freedom when you livin’ off my money,” I said. “You got ababy that ain’t got shit to do with me comin’, and you still actin’ like I’m supposed to fix your life. You need help, Kash. For real.”
“Pressure, please–”
“Nah,” I cut her off. “You made ya choice. You tried to end me, and now you gotta live with that. Whatever happen next, that’s on you.”
She was quiet for a long time. I could hear her breathin’, probably fightin’ tears, but I ain’t care enough to say more.
Finally, she whispered, “You really don’t care, huh?”
“I care ‘bout my woman, my kids, and my family,” I said. “You ain’t none of that, Kash.”
And before she could speak again, I ended the call.
I stood there for a minute. My reflection stared back at me in the mirror across the shop. I looked calm on the outside, but my mind was movin’. That conversation reopened wounds I thought had healed. I wasn’t mad, but I felt uneasy. Kashmere was the ghost that wouldn’t stay buried.
I walked back over to my people. They was still laughin’, talkin’ about the weddin’ and how slow Renza was. I joined in, actin’ like my mood hadn’t just shifted, but my mind was somewhere else.
Maybe that call was what I needed though. The closure I never got. Kash was still stuck in the same place mentally and I was on top of the world with a woman who loved me right.
I took a sip of my drink, looked over at my brothers, and smiled to myself.
Whatever came next, I was ready.
After leavin’ the tailor shop, I hopped in the whip and headed home. Durin’ the drive, my mind kept circlin’ back to that call from Kashmere. The whole shit felt off. She had called private, not to give me my damn money back, or to apologize for all the bullshit she caused, but to ask me to tell my mama to chill. That right there told me everything I needed to know. Kash was still livin’ in that same delusional ass world where she thought she could violate and then play the victim.
I wasn’t even mad at my mama for what she had been doin’, ‘cause I knew how she moved. She was the sweetest woman you’d ever meet, but once that other side of her showed, it was a wrap. My mama ain’t do loose ends, and Kashmere had become one the moment she pulled that trigger on me. The only reason she was even breathin’ was ‘cause my mama was lettin’ her. I knew she had been handlin’ business behind the scenes, movin’ in silence like she always did, but that silence was what made it dangerous. When my mama was quiet, that meant somebody was about to disappear or had already disappeared.
Still, the shit had me thinkin’. Kash had been talkin’ about how she was scared, how she just wanted peace, and how she thought my mama had somethin’ to do with her people goin’ missin’. I wasn’t stupid. I had been hearin’ whispers and seein’ headlines on the news apps. Yeah, I already knew what was up. But shid… if Kash’s folks was really gone, it was ‘cause they earned that.
I wanted to let that shit roll off me, but I couldn’t lie, Kash energy had felt toxic through the phone. She had this way ofmakin’ everything around her heavy. I had been tryna enjoy my day, just got done laughin’ with my cousins and best friend, thinkin’ about the weddin’ comin’ up, but her voice had thrown all that off. Even as I drove through Trill-Land with the sun droppin’ low and the music low in the background, I felt uneasy.
By the time I pulled into the Jungle Estate gates, my chest felt tight. The second I stepped out, though, all that heaviness started to fade. Zurie came runnin’ full speed across the yard, yellin’ my name like I was her superhero. I bent down and scooped her up, kissin’ her forehead while she laughed loud enough to make the guards smile. “Wussup, lil’ mama,” I said, ticklin’ her side till she squirmed and giggled.
Then here came Prestyn, wobblin’ across the grass on his lil’ legs with that chain swingin’ on his neck. He smiled when he saw me, them chubby cheeks bouncin’ with every step. “Come here, lil’ king,” I said, pickin’ him up and coverin’ his face with kisses. He laughed, grabbin’ at my beard. I put him down, and that was when Pluto walked up, belly round and glowin’.
I got on one knee and kissed her stomach, talkin’ low to my unborn son. “Wussup, lil’ man? You in there givin’ your mama a hard time?” I said, grinnin’ when I felt her hand brush across my head. Then I stood up and kissed her lips slow.
She looked up at me, her eyes soft. “How was your day?”
“It was straight,” I said. “Yours?”
“It was good,” she replied with a smile. “I set up some more of the baby’s stuff in the nursery.”
I chuckled. “You always settin’ up baby stuff. Ain’t nothin’ left to set up.”
She rolled her eyes, smilin’. “You just don’t see the vision yet.”
