Page 44 of Always
Jonas.
As soon as I enter the house via the garage, Raven is sitting in her usual spot on the counter but it’s Maverick that’s at the stove cooking, not Damon. Damon greets me happily with a kiss, grabbing a bottle of wine from the fridge and pouring us all a glass. I go to my wife and kiss her softly, so ready to take her upstairs and either take a nap or fuck her into oblivion, but she seems content to stay downstairs. She’s sucking on spicy candy and she looks a tiny bit better than she did before I left this morning.
I go to our room and set my things down, then go back downstairs to help with whatever Mav needs help with. He doesn’t cook very often, usually when he does it’s comfort food and it’s actually pretty tasty. We all do our part with dinner and soon we’re all sitting around the table, and I’m just happy this is usually the part of the day Raven doesn’t throw up. Sometimes she does, but other times, she’s perfect. I am reallyreallyhoping she tells me she’s pregnant soon.
I know it may sound weird. I mean, I’m barely going to be twenty-four in January, but I want to be a dad so bad. Especially if Raven’s the one giving me babies. And I’m going to be the best dadever. I’m going to be the dad I never had. No hate for Henry, I’m grateful for him, really. But I’m going to be as hands-on as I can be. I’m gonna do homework with them, and play with them, and do all the stuff I wanted to do as a kid I wishmy biological mother would’ve done with me. Before you know… she was too high to remember I was even alive.
And no Syndicate bullshit. It stops with me.
We’re sitting around the table, talking about our day when Raven gets up from the table and runs out of the room. All of us stand up but Maverick tells us he’ll help her. I know they spent all day together, and even though I want to care for her… I’m kind of the one with the most sensitive stomach out of the three. Not that I won’t be there for her, it’s just that I’ll gag with her.
I frown over at Damon but he looks more worried than I do, if I’m honest. If she is pregnant, I don’t think she should be this sick. I stare at my empty plate for a second, then decide to get up, grab the rest of them and take them to the sink but a noise grabs my attention.
I look over to see Maverick is holding two bags and Raven is holding a tray of cupcakes with sparkler candles on them. They flicker with every step she takes, a huge smile on her face and Maverick is having a hard time holding his back. I narrow my eyes at them then look over at Damon. Did I forget something? I count back and slightly shake my head. No. Mine and Raven’s sex-aversary was last week and we celebrated really,reallyhard.
“Sit down, Jonas.” Maverick orders, so I do.
Raven has me and Damon blow out the candles but none of this is making sense… until Maverick hands us the gift bags and we each open it curiously. My heart pounds in my chest and tears spring into my eyes as I hold the tiny little onesie in my hands. I look up at my wife. Every possible future I ever thought we would have is standing before me, our creation in her tummy. My thumbs go over the green letters as happy tears escape me.
I swallow my emotions down as much as I can but I croak out, “Are you sure?”
“How do you know?” Damon asks.
Maverick grins. “I took her to a doctor today.” He points to Damon’s gift bag. “I put her paperwork in there so you could go over everything. Her blood levels show she’s about nine weeks along. But we can find out more at her sonogram next week. There’s also baby books in those bags.”
I’m gonna read all of them. Front to back.Twice.No. Once a month. I’m gonna know every word by heart.
The bits and pieces of my childhood that I do remember flutter around my brain, and I already know my kid will never have that. My kid will have me.Us. A whole unit to raise them. Our family.
I get to my feet and pad over to her slowly only to kneel before her. Grabbing her hips, I place kisses on her tummy and look up at my goddess. “Really? My baby is in there?”
Raven grins while nodding down at me, tears streaming down her pretty face. Her hands go to my temples, fingers trailing into my hair. I haul her closer, pressing more kisses to her stomach. “I already love you,” I whisper hoarsely. “I already love you so much.” I lower my voice even more and then, “Even if I’m not your dad, I’m your dad, okay? You can call me whatever you want. I love you, peanut.” I feel my brows furrow. “I’m going to love you with all that I am, but you have to start being nicer to Mommy, okay? You gotta let her eat.”
Raven huffs out a laugh as I stand and pull my wife in for a kiss, tasting the salt of her happy tears mixing with mine and then hug her a little harder. “Are you happy, baby?”
More tears spring into her honey eyes but she nods, bringing her arms up and linking her fingers behind my neck. “I am s-so h-happy, baby.”
I feel Damon at my back and step to the side.
The emotion in his eyes tears at my heart. “Amourette,” he chokes.
“Daddy?”
He takes her in his arms and searches her eyes, the moment between them is so tender my heart stammers. Finally, his hand moves to her stomach. He shifts, then his jaw flexes. He tips his forehead to hers. “Every day I love you more than I did yesterday, mon coeur. Every day you give me a reason to.” He kneels, same as I did, and speaks softly to her tummy in hushed French words I can’t hear but Raven gazes down at him, pushing back his hair andsobs. When he looks back up at her, I catch- “Mon Trésorette.”
My little treasure.
She climbs into bed between Damon and I and as soon as she slips beneath the blanket I’m on her. I have to touch her. Ihave totouch her. Because touching her feels like I'm being electrocuted and branded at the same time. It does things to my brain and takes away every bad memory, and how could I live without that? How could I live without her? How could I ever not have this feeling again? I'm fucked for her. I want her- this-always.
My mouth covers hers and I feel frantic. Like if I stop, I’ll internally combust.
“Jonas!”
I don’t stop. I kiss the corner of her lips, her chin, beneath her ear. My heart pounds in my chest, thisanxietyI can’t shake. I reach between us to find she’s not wearing panties and I groan into her mouth. I move quickly to remove my boxer-briefs and even though I’m dying to get inside of her beautiful body, I plant open-mouth kisses from her lips to her tits, stomach, her inner thighs, shoving them wider, then over her clit.
I hear Damon murmuring praises but I’m busy making out with my wife’s pretty pussy, curling my tongue over her swollen clit, dipping it into her dripping hole. Every whimper brings another bout of this fucking frenetic need to make my wife ache for me. Fuck she’s so goddamn perfect.
“Such a beautiful little bird…”
