Page 44 of Be Your Forever
My entire body heats and my clit begins to throb.
Me: Well, I invited you inside, but you declined. So, I guess it’s just you and your hand tonight.
Asher: Fuck me. I’m really regretting that decision right now.
Me: * laughing emoji* *kissy face emoji*
Asher: Oh it’s funny, huh?
Me: …maybe
Asher: I wonder if it'll be that funny when I’m shoving my cock so far down your throat you’ll choke.
Me: ...
Asher: What, no smart remark? I’m disappointed, bear. But I’m so goddamn proud of you, baby. Seeing you learn to accept your body is hot as fuck.
Me: You make me feel sexy.
Asher: No, you are sexy all on your own. Now I need to take care of this situation you put me in. But Bri?
Me: Yeah?
Asher: Just know it’ll be your name that I’m yelling. And as I’m fucking my fist, I’m thinking of how it feels to call you mine. Night, Bri.
His.
The more I think about it, the more appealing it sounds. I think about sharing my life, my fears, my vulnerabilities with anyone else, and it feels wrong.
His.
I realize I want nothing more than to be his person. I put falling in love on my list, but maybe I need to make an amendment to that item. I don’t want to fall in love with anyone but Asher Larson. Hell, I’m probably already halfway there.
Brianna
How is he here right now?
Todayismyfirsttherapy session, and I’m beyond nervous. I take the cloudless sky as a good sign that I am on the right path. Well, that and there was zero traffic on the drive over. Ted, my Uber driver, was incredible. He could sense some nervousness and offered me control of the music, so naturally I put on comforting spa sounds. The theme of the day seems to be tranquility, because the moment we pulled into the parking lot, I knew this was where I needed to be. The soft brick exterior with vines crawling up the side is surrounded by a slew of trees—which I guess makes sense since nature can be quite therapeutic. Whoever chose this location had their patients in mind. To my right is a white, metal bench and over to the left is a bird feeder. I watch as robins flutter their wings while pecking at the bird feed.
I thought the outside was inviting, but it doesn’t compare to the inside of the therapy office. The walls of the waiting room are a soft lilac blue, providing a sense of security and comfort. The hardwood flooring is deep gray, and scattered throughout the room are a mixture of velvet chairs and couches in dark gray and blue. I anxiously check my phone for the hundredth time, and that’s when I see a text from Asher.
Asher: Hey, bear. I wanted to say how proud I am of you for going to therapy. You are a headstrong, determined woman. If you need anything please let me know. You got this, baby ??
Me: Thank you. I’m so nervous but it’s time.
Asher: Curious, what therapy place did you end up choosing?
Me: Therapy Connections. Cas gave me the recommendation and when I talked to the therapist on the phone, I instantly felt relief. I think this is a good fit.
Asher: Yeah, that’s where I went when I was dealing with everything with my brother. I’ll let you go. Proud of you.
I’m smiling like a crazy person when I hear footsteps. I look up and the woman in front of me screams no-judgement.
Dr. Jacqui gives off a witchy vibe with a crystal necklace hanging from her neck. She’s dressed in an off white sweater with a dark green, corduroy skirt. She has on lacy, black, pattern tights with black combat boots on. I internally shake my head. Caswouldrecommend this woman to me. Her brown hair is in soft waves that rest against her shoulders, and she has a cat in a witches hat pin on her sweater. Already, I feel at ease in her presence.
“Hello, Brianna. Welcome.” She offers me a reassuring smile as I hand her the completed paperwork. “Oh, good, you’ve completed everything. You can follow me back to my office.”
We enter her office, and it gives the same vibe as the waiting room. But instead of blue walls, they are a soft cream color, and the couch is forest green. I sit down and it feels like a hug from a friend. Dr. Jacqui goes over the rules of confidentiality and that I have complete control in what I choose to share.
