Page 83 of Caleb
“Well, lie again,” I say, irritated. “People lie all the time.” I’m so tired of having to deal with this topic over and over again, only to keep watching her wallow in a big puddle of her misery.
“I can’t.” Annette plucks the cigarette out of my fingers and takes a drag. She shoots a plume of smoke out the window and hands the cigarette back to me. “James would know it was either Scott or Lewis and could fire them both because of it. They were the only ones present when he last met with this woman. Or so Scott says.”
“How convenient.” I give my cigarette one last pull before tossing it out the window. “What doyoubelieve?” I lean back against the wall. “What doyouwant?”
She crosses her arms at her chest and shakes her head.
“I don’t—I wish he would stop,” she says, a few tears starting to slide down her cheeks. Fuck me. “If he would promise to stop, I could find it in me to forgive him.”
She’s lost her mind.
“Annette.” I close the distance between us. “He’snotgoing to change. You need to accept that.”
A sob escapes her throat, and I immediately hold her hands in between mine to console her. She rests her cheek on my chest and wraps her arms around my waist. I embrace her and settle my chin on her head.
She knows deep down he’s not going to change.
“Would you stay in Paris?” she says, still holding me.
“What do you mean?” I whisper back.
“If I ended things with James and I asked you to stay, would you stay?”
“Annette—” I break off the embrace and hold her at arm’s length. She cuts me off before I can say another word.
“Let me just say it.” She brushes the tears off her face. I nod. “With my contacts, I could find a job for you outside of the Embassy. You wouldn’t need to go back to Israel. And I could get a job somewhere else too. We could both start over. We could get a fresh start. Together.” Annette’s eyes are gleaming with hope, like she’s been giving this Plan B some thought for a while.
All I can do is stare at her. She’s curve-balled the hell out of me with this one.
“You know we’re good together.” She places her hand on my cheek. “Who knows, maybe we could be great.” She’s crying again, and with just reason.
“Annette,” I mutter, cupping her hand, “you are in love with that man. You don’t know what you’re saying. And I—”
Hesitating, I allow myself a few seconds to take a deep breath. I need to think about what I’m going to say and how I’m going to say it. I don’t want her to feel rejected when she’s feeling this vulnerable. But I can’t do it. I can’t stay here and explore things with her romantically when I know Red’s all I’ll be thinking about. When she’s in love with someone else. It just doesn’t make sense.
“The fact that I love him doesn’t mean that I want to,” she allows. “And I’ve learned the hard way that sometimes love is not enough. And if there’s no loyalty on top of that, how can I build a foundation with him? It’s been years, and he still hasn’t shown me a shred of it. But you, Caleb … are one of the most loyal people I know. If notthemost. Are you going to deny there’s an attraction between us?”
This is the moment where I lose Annette forever.
“I’m sorry.” I catch one of her hands and place it between mine. Her expression is back to dull and lifeless. “You know how much I care about you, and the intimate moments we’ve shared were special to me. They meant something, but—”
“You’re in love with her, aren’t you?” Her tone is laced with jealousy. “WithRed.”
My brows pull down.How did she find out about the nickname?
“Scott told me,” she says as if reading my mind. “He heard you calling her that on the ride back to Paris from Deauville. The day she got sick. But don’t worry. James doesn’t know. But he insists you’re too emotionally attached to her. Even if I failed to convince him otherwise.” She nips her lower lip and shakes her head. “I guess he was right.”
“That’s not—”
True.
But I can’t make myself say the words when I know they’re lies. I also don’t want to open up about my feelings for Red with Annette. It’s too dangerous. She’s too emotionally wrecked and unstable right now. Even if she cares about me, you never know. I can’t be too careful.
And I signed a fucking contract that says I can’t talk about my feelings.
“You know,” she says, walking toward the door with a scoff, “I thought you were jealous every time I told you about my fights with James. ThatIwas the one you secretly wanted. But you weren’t, and I’m not.” She rests her forehead against the door. “You were just being a genuinely good friend to me, which only makes you even more perfect.”
“I will never be remotely close to being perfect.”
