Page 126 of Lovestruck at Sundown
“And how did that turn out for you?” I tilted my head, curious to see what he would say. Erin, his ex-girlfriend, ended up cheating on him with her co-star. “It’s inevitable for two humans to feelsomethingwhen they’re kissing and touching and pretending to fuck. Even if it’s arousal. And I fucking hate to think you’re getting aroused by someone else while I’m at home doing homework. It makes me feel stupid and naïve.”And I’m scared shitless that you’ll leave me one day for a beautiful actress who understands your job better than I ever will.
My insecurities made me feel pathetic. But I knew I wasn’t crazy either to think this way. I understood this was a movie premiere of a film he’d worked onbeforewe were together. And even so, it was hard to process. But the growing pit in my stomach confirmed that this was going to be a thorn in our relationship. The thought of sharing William with all these other gorgeous actresses was killing me.
“I am not going to step out on you with my co-stars or anyone else if that’s what you mean,” he said, his tone sharper this time. “You don’t have to be an actor to cheat.”
“No, you don’t. But you will always be surrounded by temptation, and it becomes easier when you’re doing that.”
“When I’m doing what? Acting? Working?” William was upset now, too. And I was a second away from losing my temper. “It doesn’t mean anything.”
“I guess it’s easy to say when you’re getting little tastes here and there, with the excuse of it being work.”
“That’s not how it is.” William pinched the bridge of his nose, the frustration evident in how long it took him to open his eyes and look at me again. “Youknewwhat you were signing up for.”
“Did I, William?” I asked sarcastically. “I didn’t even know you were an actor when we met. I’m still trying to catch up with everything. With you.”
“I thought you did.”
“Well, I didn’t know it would hurt so much.” I stood and fetched the box of tissues on my nightstand to wipe my runny nose.This fucking cold.My eyes itched like crazy, and my overall state only added to the “not feeling good enough for someone like William” pile.
I couldn’t turn to face him when I asked, “Did you guys hook up?”
“What?”
I braced my hands on the nightstand and let my head hang for a few seconds. “Did you sleep with her? With Arabella Rivers, when you were filming the movie, and I was with Nathan, and you said you wanted to be with me.”
His silence made me turn around to face him. I had no business asking him who he slept with when we weren’t together, but I wanted to make a point.
“We did.” He rested his forearms over his knees and steepled his fingers.
I nodded and chewed on my lower bit to stop it from trembling. “So, I’m not too crazy to assume co-stars hook up on a regular basis once the director yells cut?”
“No,” he agreed. “Not when everyone’s asingle, consenting adult.”
“And now you’re going on a press tour with this woman for the next two weeks?”
He stared at me but was smart enough to say nothing.
“With this woman with whom you had fake sex and real sex and is currently single, from what I could gather from a quick Google search when I excused myself to the bathroom?”
More silence.
“So, the answer is stillno, William.” Tears streamed down my face, but I quickly brushed them off because I was more angry than sad, and I needed William to understand that. “I didn’t know what I was signing up for. And it feels like I never will.”
“Guille.” William’s eyes softened, and he stood with every intention of coming closer, but I held out my hand to stop him from approaching me. I could finally see the understanding in his eyes, but I wasn’t ready to be held by him, even if a part of me craved it. “I’m sorry.”
“I think it’s best if you leave right now.”
“No.”
“I’m not asking,” I said with a frustrated laugh, walking past him to grab a fresh pair of underwear and pajamas from my closet. I needed a hot shower, an even hotter Theraflu tea to sweat this bug away, and the comfort of my bed for the next 24 to 36 hours straight.
“I’m not leaving until we sort this out.”
“Well, you are leaving tomorrow, and I think it’s a great idea because I need some space right now.”
“We don’t dospace,” he scoffed. “Or breaks, or timeouts. We don’t take time apart to think about things we can tackle together. Never.”
“Suit yourself.” Ugh. I loved that he said that, but I was still upset. I closed the bathroom door, took my sweet time in the shower, and made sure to be extra thorough with my skincare routine, expecting William to be gone when I stepped out. Secretly hoping he wasn’t.
