Page 75 of Break Point
“I know I messed up. And I know you’re still angry about seeing me drunk. I get it. You’ve told me how hard it was dealing with your dad, and I promise it won’t happen again.”
I sigh, tucking my hair behind my ears. The next part is harder to say, but I have to.
“I’m sorry it happened the way it did.” I blow out a defeated breath. “It was out of place. I was still with Liam, even if I’d already made up my mind about ending things. I put you in an uncomfortable position, and I regret that, too.” I swallow hard and meet his eyes. “I don’t want to lose you again. I don’t want that kiss to cost us something real.”
“You won’t,” he says. “I can’t lose you either. I wouldn’t allow it. But I might not be as good or righteous as you think I am.”
That stops me.
“I’m not sorry I kissed you,” he admits, making me frown. “I know I initiated it, but I got … carried away. I’m sorry.”
“No, Henry. I …” I shake my head, confused. “I kissedyou.”
“No, Bells. You didn’t,” he says with a soft chuckle. “But you sure as hell kissed me back.”
He smiles, and the butterflies in my stomach go haywire.
We stare at each other for a long moment as I try to dig through the hazy memories of that night. I remember the feeling of kissing him all too well. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. If I let myself linger on that fleeting moment, it still makes my bones vibrate. But the memory is incomplete. I don’t know who leaned in first. Not that it matters much, anyway.
“I should’ve known better,” he says, looking away.
“I don’t mind,” I say quickly, like that might stop him from spiraling.
“You should,” he says, standing up and beginning to pace. “Your dad would kill me if he found out. I can’t break his trust. Joe gave me a chance to start over. He’s helped my family in ways I can’t begin to explain. He entrusted me with your tennis career, and the second you’re vulnerable, we’re kissing?”
He stops and looks right at me.
“Henry—”
“It can’t happen again.”
My lower lip trembles, so I bite down on it to make it stop. The emotions hit me hard, but I can’t let Henry notice. My heart wants to throw a tantrum, but my head knows better. Knows that my friendship with him and his presence in my life matter more than anything else.
“Bells, you know how much I care about you,” he says, dropping his hands in front of him, the weight of defeat settling in his posture. “Breaking up with Liam was the right call. And I won’t lie; the news made me happy. You know, for personal reasons.”
He squats in front of me, leveling his gaze with mine.
“You were starting to lose your edge out there, and I could tell Liam had something to do with it. But that doesn’t mean your relationship didn’t matter. You’re still dealing with the breakup. I know you, and I know you’ve been crying.”
I keep forgetting how well Henry knows me. I can’t hide from him. And he’s not wrong. But no matter how much I try to reason with myself, Ifeelsomething whenever he’s around. And it’s only getting stronger with time.
“It would be selfish and greedy for me to want more than our friendship,” he says. “Your relationship with Liam was already costing you your focus, and you saw how it affected your performance in China. How it led you to that party, trying to wash the frustration away with a few drinks.”
Henry exhales sharply, disappointment laced in every breath. “You and I …” He waves a limp hand between us. “We can’t be careless when it comes to drinking.”
“But—”
He cuts me off again, holding up a hand. The words die in my throat.
“I made Joe a promise, Bells. You’ve got great things going for you.You’re on the right path. Big sponsors are backing you up. You’re young, healthy, and just getting started. And I won’t be the one to fuck that up for you. Not if I can help it. So I refuse to get in the way because there’s nothing you want more in life than tennis. And you know it.”
I do. Or at least, IthoughtI did until Henry came back. And after we kissed, everything got more confusing. But how am I supposed to ignore these feelings? I don’t know how.
“What if I want you too?” I say bluntly.
Who says I can’t have both? Henry understands this world. He’s always been a part of it. Still is. We could make it work.
He looks at me, silent for a few seconds, probably letting my words sink in, and shakes his head.
