Page 25 of Nailing Heat
“Is it hard to not play anymore?” she asks me quietly.
I shrug again. “Sometimes, yeah. I thought being a trainer for the Patriots would be great. But it made it harder that I wasn’t playing anymore. Not losing the atmosphere of the game made it feel like home, but not being able to jump into the game was torture sometimes.”
“Wasn’t it rough being in the NFL? I mean, those are big guys who are running at each other in hopes of hurting each other. And I don’t know, you don’t seem as big as some of the guys…” Her voice trails off as she watches me.
It’s my turn to laugh at her. “I did stop weightlifting and training. Had I kept that up, I would be bigger, and I’d look more like an NFL player. But there’s also padding. I was a quarterback, so there was no need for me to be huge. I wasn’t trying to tackle anyone. I was trying not to get tackled and throw the ball down the field.”
“And into the end zone,” she states proudly.
“Yes, and into the end zone.” Amelia watches me for a moment, drawing her bottom lip in between her teeth. There’s a question there, I can see it. “’What do you want me to ask me?”
“Is that why your marriage didn’t work? Did she expect a different life from you and when that didn’t happen…” She doesn’t finish her thought, so it hangs out there.
I clear my throat, hoping to get rid of the lump that has formed there. “Uh, no. She knew that I couldn’t play in the NFL. I was injured back in my senior year, so the NFL wasn’t really an option for me.”
She nods. “Can I ask?”
I shake my head. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be rude; I don’t want to talk about it tonight.”
“Ah, so this isn’t a pizza kind of talk. But maybe a talk wherewe have alcohol present?” She is trying to make light of the situation, and I appreciate that.
“Yeah, maybe.” I reply. I’m not committing to answering questions about it yet. The wounds are still fresh, and the emotions are still raw. I don’t know that I feel comfortable talking to Amelia about Elise. I might talk to August at some point but I’m not willing to share my secrets with Amelia. Yet.
Amelia seems to pick up on the meaning of my silence, so she swiftly changes the subject. “How was having lunch with the Cromwells? Was it weird?”
I shake my head and chuckle. “No, Maxwell used to come and take us to dinner at school. My parents and his parents get along pretty well.”
“So, they have money too?” Amelia’s hand smacks across her mouth as soon as she finishes her thought. “I’m so sorry. That’s not appropriate for me to ask you.”
It’s then I notice that she hasn’t stopped fidgeting. Her leg bounces wildly as she waits to see how I am going to react to what she has just said. “No, it’s not the most appropriate question, but I appreciate you asking me.” I think a moment before answering her. “I don’t think my parents are as well off as the Cromwells. My parents are separated. I stayed with my mother. My father did very well in business and continued to send my mother money; a lot like alimony, but I took it as guilt money. He never came around. She was happy to be with us and because of how much he sent, she didn’t have to work when we were younger. I have three sisters.”
“Wow, are your sisters older or younger than you?” Amelia leans forwards and rests her elbows on her knees. Like everything I’m about to say to her will be the most interesting thing she’s ever heard.
“I’m the baby of the family,” I tell her, grinning. “My sisters are Amy, Meg and Jo,” I say the names, and I can see she immediatelyknows where they are from. “Yes, my mother has a thing forLittle Women.”
She giggles. “Why aren’t you named fromLittle Women?”
“Are you mocking me?” I ask her. Her giggles turn into all-out laughter. “You’re mocking me. I may not know you very well, but I can tell that you are mocking me,” I tease her.
“Yeah, I can see that you’re all broken up about it,” she teases me back. “Sorry!” Her cheeks flush and I stare at her. She’s so adorable. But I remind myself that I can’t think of that, of her that way. My marriage recently fell apart and she’s on the team that I’m the trainer for. It would make a mess of the new life that I am working so hard to create. “Will your sisters ever come to visit you?” she asks, changing the subject.
I shrug. “I don’t know. They live in Boston. They would come in for football games sometimes. I’m not sure if they’ll make their way here.”
“How much older are they than you?”
“The famous Langley triplets are about three years older than I am so I’m twenty-eight. Jo is an English teacher, working on her doctorate. Meg works as a graphic designer and Amy is a music teacher.” I grin, waiting for the jokes about Jo. But I don’t hear anything about it. “I would expect if they would come here at all, it would be over the summer when school is out.” I shrug, unsure. They are all pretty unhappy with me.
My sisters were never really big fans of Elise. They found her snooty and thought she looked down her nose at them. Apparently, being schoolteachers when you have the type of education that my sisters do is “ridiculous.” And being a graphic designer is “just doodling.” So, while they weren’t Elise’s biggest fans, I think it’s some kind of feminist thing that is keeping them from rushing down here to Tampa, even though they were excited when they heard where I was relocating to.
“It would have to be when I found my own place,” I tell her. Iam hoping to fill the silence since she’s been starting at me for so long.
“Well, I think it would be fun to meet them.”
“Why? You seem like you barely tolerate me?” I tease her.
“You’re growing on me. You know, like a fungus does,” Amelia replies, laughing at her own joke.
I roll my eyes. “Thanks. I appreciate the hospitality until August gets this mess figured out.”
