Page 59 of Quiet Protector
“I know,” he replies, his voice cracking. “And I love you too… but I’ll always be your number two.”
Tears topple down my cheeks when I shake my head, trying to deny a truth I’ve always known. “No, you won’t.”
“Yes, I will,” Julian immediately fires back. “When I placed a blanket over you and Brandon last night, I realized I deserve to have someone who’ll sleep sitting up to comfort me. I deserve to have someone who looks at me how you look at Brandon. I deserve to be someone’s number one, too.”
“You do,” I agree, nodding. “You deserve the world.”
I’m not lying. Julian is the perfect man. He just isn’t Brandon. Brandon was my first love, the man I loved before he was a man. I don’t see anyoneeverbeing able to compete with that, but that doesn’t mean I also can’t feel guilt.
“I’m sorry, Julian. For the years wasted, for the pain. I never meant to hurt you.”
“No.” He bands his arms around me before pulling me in close to his fit body. “This isn’t on you, Mel. You never promised me anything you couldn’t give me.” He wipes away the tears streaming down my face before raising my chin to a position it doesn’t deserve to be in. “In all honesty, I just didn’t realize what I was missing out on until this weekend.” His smile shouldn’t be as comforting as it is, especially considering the circumstances, but for some strange reason, it is. “My campaign is probably a little long in the tooth, but I want to be selfish for just a moment.”
Aware his comment has nothing to do with his political dreams, I assure him, “Love isn’t selfish, Julian. Wanting to be loved unconditionally isn’t selfish.” I wipe under my nose with the sleeve of my shirt before squashing my ear to his chest. “It hurts thinking about you with anyone else, but the pain won’t be as bad if it gives you the happily ever after you deserve. I’m sorry that person couldn’t be me, Julian. I truly never meant to hurt you.”
He doesn’t reply. He doesn’t need to. The extra flutter his heart got during my apology tells me everything I need to know. He is also sorry things didn’t work out between us, but he’s optimistic our relationship was a necessary path we had to take to make us better people.
I wholeheartedly agree with him. I wouldn’t be the woman I am now if I had never met Julian. For that alone, I’ll forever adore him.
We stay huddled together in the middle of Julian’s room until the buzz of the Presidential suite doorbell rings through my ears. It adds an extra thump to Julian’s heart, whereas it floods my eyes with fresh tears.
“That will be Fetu. He’s driving me to the airport.” After pressing his lips to my temple, Julian moves to the bed to gather the last of his belongings. “This is for Brandon.” He folds the handwritten letter into quarters before handing it to me. “If he doesn’t follow this exactly, I’ll be back to kick his ass as I’m still kind of wishing I had done last night when he kissed you.”
“Julian—” He pushes his finger to my lips, stopping my apology before it’s close to being delivered.
Nothing but honesty rings in his tone when he says, “It felt like a million knives were being stabbed into my chest, but it was the sign I had been seeking the past nine months.” Salty blobs slip down my face when he cups my cheeks so he can press his lips to my forehead. “I’ll never regret us, Mel. You’ll always have a place in my story. It just won’t be the number one spot.” I nod, deserving the flip his comment hit my stomach with. “Stay in touch.”
“I will,” I reply, shadowing him to the foyer. Although I can’t see Brandon, I know he’s awake. I can feel his eyes on me. He’s keeping his distance because even a blind man would be able to see the tension bristling between Julian and me. It isn’t an uneasy feeling, more sentimental than anything. “Will you tell your mom I said hello?”
Julian smiles a true grin. “I will… but I think she’d rather hear it from you.”
“Okay.” I suck in a big breath, relieved the end of our relationship doesn’t mean I lose him altogether. I care for his mother, so losing her as well would have doubled the blow. “Thank you.”
Julian dips his chin before handing his suitcase to Fetu and shadowing him to the idling elevator. Confident all is said and done, I commence closing the door, only stopping when Julian calls my name. “Yeah?”
Fresh tears burn my ears when he says, “Don’t let that son of a bitch get away with what he did to you. You fight him until the end.”
“I will.” Even looking like a wreck, nothing can take away from the determination on my face.
“Good girl,” Julian murmurs before he enters the elevator car on Fetu’s heel.
Just before the doors close, I sign something I should have never withheld from him. “I love you.”
His smile eases the pain stretched across my chest before his reply utterly alleviates it. “I love you too. I will never stop.”
24
Brandon
“How is she holding up?”
As my eyes stray from Melody, who’s being led into the interview room at Saugerties PD, to Grayson, I prop my ankle onto my opposite knee, praying it will stop their nervous bobs. “She’s doing okay considering. For years, she thought justice had been served. She had no clue the sick fuck was still walking the streets assaulting other women.”
Grayson’s jaw tightens at my last sentence, but since he can’t deny my underhanded claim that Madden is a serial rapist, he shifts his focus elsewhere. “And your mom?”
The knot in my stomach tightens as I recall the expression on my mother’s face when Madden was placed into the back of a police cruiser three days ago. She was pleased he was alive but devastated at the same time. She knows her children, so even with Madden denying all claims he raped Melody, she knows what he did to her. She was already struggling to work out how to tell me Joey’s death wasn’t suicide, so this really knocked her for a loop.
Contractors working on the house found surveillance cameras planted around the ranch in inconspicuous places. From the scope of the equipment and where they were planted, it was clear who had placed them there—Mr. Gregg.
