Page 67 of Gin & Jewels
“But if it doesn’t take that long, you don’t need to stay.”
“Cass.” He cupped my cheek and brushed a lone tear away. “Don’t forget that I’m a grown-ass man, and I make my own decisions.” He smiled.
“I know. I just—”
“Shh. I’m going to step out into the hall real quick.”
“Okay.”
He kissed the top of my head before he left the room. As soon as I couldn’t see him anymore, the tears started to flow. I had never really thought about starting a family, but the thought of never being able to hurt. It should have been my decision, not some asshole who’d decided guns were the answer.
“Oh, honey! What’s wrong?”
I opened my eyes to see Shannon walking through the door. I wiped away the tears. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to visit you.” She grabbed my hand. “Why are you crying, sweetie?”
I barely knew Shannon, but she was a woman, and she would understand more than Brad. “The doctor came to see me.”
“Yeah?” she prompted.
“The surgery went well, and I’ll make a full recovery.”
“That’s good.”
“But …” Tears started to well in my eyes again.
“It’s okay. How about I tell you what happened to me?” She pulled the chair closer to the bed and sat down. She reached for my hand again before she began. “About four years ago, I went in for my routine pap smear. You never think it’s going to be you, especially when your cancer has basically no symptoms, but they found a lump during the breast exam, and the unknown was hard. Was it cancer? Was it a benign tumor? It was tough to live each day not knowing. And then when I was told it was cancer, I was alone and scared.”
“You were alone?”
“Bradley was in the Marines at the time.”
“Oh, right.”
“But that’s my point, honey. We’ve all had our hardships, but whatever it is, you have me and Bradley to care for you.”
I wanted to believe her. I really had no reason to doubt her or Brad—especially Brad. He saved my life when Micky showed up. I could have bled out if it wasn’t for him. Micky could have come closer and shot me again if it weren’t for Brad defusing the situation. And Brad had told me numerous times that he wasn’t going anywhere.
I took a deep breath. “The bullet grazed my uterus and destroyed one of my fallopian tubes. The doctor said I might not be able to have children.” Tears streamed down my face again.
“Oh, Cassie.” Shannon stood and hugged me the best she could. “I’m so sorry.”
“The crazy thing is that I hadn’t thought about having kids, but now that it might not even be a possibility …”
“I know, honey. I know.”
When I opened my eyes, I saw Brad standing just inside the door. He had a look of sorrow on his face, and that made me cry even more. No one had ever looked at me that way. I was sad and crying, but I was also happy because I was finally starting to feel loved.
When I steppedout into the hall, I called Mark first and told him that shit went down and to not book me for another three weeks or so. Then, I called Gabe.
“Hey,” he answered.
“I killed a guy yesterday.”
He was silent for a second. “Are you calling from jail?”
“No,” I grunted and leaned against the wall. “Just telling you shit went down.”
