Page 67 of Shameless
“Yeah.” I looked down and finished my bite. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
He lifted my chin so we could lock eyes. “I was worried it would cause problems between you and Deb. It was so long ago that I really didn’t think it was a big deal.”
“How could you not?”
He dropped his hand and shrugged. “Because of who I was back then. Hell, I tried to kiss you on the first night. I was full of teenage hormones and after not getting any for several weeks, your aunt and I just … you know.”
“So, it meant nothing to you?”
He blew out a long breath and I swallowed, suddenly not hungry. “It meant nothing in the sense you’re talking about. Debs and I really connectedthat summerbecause I had no one else to talk to. She was going through a hard time getting back into the dating world. I was a horny eighteen-year-old, and when the time came, I went for it. Before yesterday at the hospital, the last time I had seen or spoken with her was the day I left this farm and went back to Houston.”
“I understand, but you said we should take a road trip to visit her. Did you plan to just pretend it didn’t happen?”
“Yeah,” he said right away.
I blinked. “Really?”
“Because it was so long ago and no romantic feelings were involved. I really didn’t think it was an issue.”
“Just another notch on your belt?”
“No.” He shook his head. “It wasn’t like that either. She …”
“She?” I prompted after he didn’t continue for several moments.
He swallowed and then blew out another long exhale. “She wanted to feel good and, well … I helped her do that.”
I stared off into the distance, contemplating what I needed to do. I had two choices: forgive him for not telling me and move on, or continue to be mad about something that happened long ago and couldn’t be changed. It wasn’t ideal to know that the man I loved had slept with someone I held in high regard. Someone I loved like a mother. But it happened over a decade ago before Blake and I meant anything to each other.
“Okay.”
He raised a brow. “Okay?”
“I want us to move on from this.”
“Are you sure?”
I nodded. “I can’t change it and I kinda understand why you never told me. It was just a hard pill to swallow, made worse by the way I found out, and the timing of it all.”
“I know.” He reached under me, picking me up with his powerful arms and moving me so I was straddling him. “I truly am sorry for withholding this, and I promise you that I will try never to make you cry again.” He placed a soft kiss against my lips, then I leaned on his chest until the dark settled in around us.
“We better head back,” I said.
“Yeah. I’m sure my mom is worried sick.”
“Probably.” I stood on the foot railings of the ATV and turned back around to drive us back to the farm. “Oh, and how do you think your mom will handle the news that you slept with her best friend?”
“I’m not going to tell her. That would be horrible.”
“What if she sees the journal?”
“Then I guess I’ll deal with itifthat happens.”
When we got back to the house, no one said anything about Blake sleeping with my aunt. It made me wonder if Roger had found the journal and hid it so Aimee wouldn’t see and know her best friend had betrayed her trust. Nothing was ever said and the memory of how awesome my aunt was lived on.
24
Blake
