“Just the standard ones,” I replied.
“Did he give you any rules about your courting?” Ocean-blue irises locked on mine as one white eyebrow arched.
Right. He wasn’t going to drop this. And in truth, he probably shouldn’t. But that didn’t mean I enjoyed this conversation.
“Escape is a hollow victory if you remain a Noir, Lay,” he added as if to provide me with a reason to walk down this discussion path again. “Because your father won’t let you anywhere near the palace with those wings. So help us figure out how you Fell. That’s the only way to fix this. And we both know it has something to do with your courting. Nothing else makes sense.”
He was right, of course. About everything. And I sort of hated him for that.
I stretched my wings as far out of my view as possible, hating the ebony plumes, and tucked them into my back.
Novak’s feathers followed, interlocked with mine.
His icy gaze watched me, intense and unnerving. I couldn’t tell what he thought of my hopes to reform. Did he want to reform as well? Or had he given up the route of redemption?
He rarely spoke, so it was hard to know. But I suspected it was the latter, that he’d chosen to embrace his dark path instead of venturing back into the light.
Auric turned, noting Novak’s wings tangled with mine. Rather than comment, he focused on me. “What rules did he give you about courtship?”
“Just to treat all my suitors with respect and allow them to test our suit,” I replied. His nostrils flared at my words, making me realize I’d phrased that badly. “Not…test, like sex. But test in terms of, uh, scent. And like dinner. And normal things.” I cleared my throat. “He just wanted to make sure I took each suitor seriously.”
“And what happened after that?”
“I went into my courtship period,” I replied.
“Layla,” he said, pushing away from the window to stand right before me. “We are never going to figure this out if you keep holding back.”
“I’m not holding back.”
“Youareholding back. Did one of the suitors try to hurt you?”
“What? No. Of course not.” That would imply I had let them close enough to touch me, which I hadn’t. At all. “They just weren’t right.”
“Well, did you treat them respectfully?” Auric pressed.
“Of course I did.” Initially, I’d actually been excited and nervous for my courtship season. The promise of finally meeting a worthy mate had interested me. Although, it’d mostly intrigued me because I’d hoped it would help me stop dreaming of Auric—something that had happened pretty much all my life.
I’d been looking forward to a new possibility, one that would overshadow my desire for Auric.
Which had clearly not worked at all.
Except for maybe Novak now, but he was an entirely different problem.
“You’re not telling me something,” Auric said, his tone insistent.
I scowled at him.There are a lot of things I’m not telling you,I thought bitterly. But none of those things were relevant. Well, except for maybe… “The suitors became more, um, aggressive as time went on. Or maybecompetitiveis the right word? There were just so many of them.” My chaperone had a list longer than my arm. The whole thing had felt entirely overwhelming. And yet not one of them had suited.
Not. A. Single. One.
“Aggressive, how?” Auric pressed, a dangerous tone to his voice.
I’d just told him none of them had hurt me. And it was the truth. They’d just become overwhelming at times.
“They were insistent,” I said, trying for a better term. “Like they would insist upon additional meetings even after I stated my disinterest.”
Auric frowned.
Novak listened.