Page 117 of Hell Fae Warden
She considered that for a long moment, her brow furrowing. “Actually, that reminds me of what Melek said earlier.”
I ran my fingers through her dark blonde hair as I asked, “What did he say?”
“That he doesn’t think the book took me to the source. He thinks I did it myself.” Her stormy eyes held a note of worry in them. “If I did, it wasn’t intentional. And I have no idea how I did it.”
I wasn’t sure if she was confiding this to me because she assumed I already knew or because she wanted someone to talk to about it. Maybe both.
“He told me I need to read Vita more, that I need to trust it to guide me,” she continued. “He also said the book is part of Lucifer’s soul.”
My eyebrows rose. “He said all that?”
She nodded. “I’m not sure what to think about it. Everything… it’s a lot. Even the Midnight Fae Source Architect insinuated that there was something unique about me. But what could it be? My dad was just a normal Hell Fae.”
“Maybe he wasn’t that normal,” I suggested. “I mean, he was able to evade Az’s Phoenix. Just like you.”
“So maybe he’s been hiding near the source…?” she asked, her brow furrowing. “Wouldn’t Lucifer feel him there?”
“One would think, but he didn’t sense you, did he?”
“I don’t know,” she admitted. “But if he does again, I’m a dead fae.”
“Maybe, maybe not,” I hedged. “I know he said that, but if what Melek told you is true about wanting to mate you, then I don’t think it’s going to be that simple.”
She chewed her lower lip, her brow crinkling again. “I don’t know what to think about that either. I’m not sure if I want a mate. I’m… I’m not sure what I want in general.”
“Probably not what most men want to hear after spending several hours in bed with a woman,” I joked. “But I understand.”
And I meant it, too. I had no idea what I wanted either. All I knew was that I wanted Camillia. However, I couldn’t keep her long-term. So I’d enjoy her while I could and go from there.
An uncomfortable sensation brewed in my chest, one that reminded me again of my past and of the lives I’d lost.
Camillia had gotten under my skin, maybe even clawed her way into my frozen heart. But I was a realist. I knew this couldn’t go beyond the present. Lucifer would never allow it.
Unless Az is right and all he wants to do is punish me for fun.
So what would that mean? What would it look like for me? For Camillia? For Az? Was Lucifer playing a long game, using me as a pawn for some grander purpose?
Is Melek?I wondered in the next beat.Is he trying to maneuver me into a certain place?
Lucifer and Melek had always been enigmas to me. While I understood much of Lucifer’s intentions with the Nightmare Fae and the Hell Fae Realm, I’d never truly understood him—the man behind the Hell Fae King mask.
But Az does,I mused.And Az thinks Lucifer is playing with me.
“You’re thoughtful again,” Camillia said softly, her hand reaching up to brush my face. “About what I said or something else?”
I pondered that for a few seconds, debating how to answer.
She’d been truthful with me, so I wanted to return the favor.
Mostly because we seemed to have reached a more comfortable balance with each other, one that I didn’t want to disrupt.
“I’m thinking about something Az told me earlier.” I cleared my throat, trying to figure out a way to word it but decided to be blunt. “He didn’t understand why I was refraining from touching you, so I told him I suspect Lucifer is testing me. Az laughed and essentially said any test designed by Lucifer is meant to be failed because the Hell Fae King likes to dole out punishment.”
Her eyes widened. “That’s why you weren’t touching me? Because you think it’s a test?”
“I know it is,” I told her. “He reassigned me to guard you for a reason. He wanted to see if I could refrain from the temptation, or, if Az is to be believed, how long it would take me to refrain.”
Her nose scrunched. “Oh. That can’t be good.”
