Page 140 of Cruelly Bitten
“I’m not a perfect man, Ismerelda.” I drew my fingers through her wet hair, combing the strands all the way down to the top of her breast. “But I’m going to do right by you.”
And I wasn’t talking about simply rectifying the last few weeks. I intended to fixeverythingI’d done wrong.
“I should never have left you,” I whispered against her ear. “I was weak. Confused by my ties to humanity. Operating on a hero complex. But I’m not a hero, Ismerelda. I’m not a savior or a beacon of hope. Whoever that man was is dead. And good fucking riddance.”
Because that man had been too caught up in his obsession with fixing the world to care about anything—or anyone—else.
“I’m not him,” I vowed. “But, of course, you already know that.”
She kept thinking about how I wasn’therCam.
“We’re just going to have to redefine what that means,” I said. “I might not be the version you remember, but I’m still yours.”
Assuming she’ll still have me.
I pressed my nose to her throat and inhaled her sweet scent, my incisors aching for a taste.
But I refused to bite her.
I’d taken too much. Indulged in her to the point of pain—pain I could now feel as though it were my own as I relived the experiences through her memories.
What I’d seen as pleasure had actually been agony in her mind, her body betraying her wants and needs as she fell apart over and over again beneath my bite.
I swallowed, her torment piercing my heart.
This female had been mine to protect and cherish, and I’d hurt that trust. Betrayed her love. Damaged hersoul.
I shook my head, confused by the onslaught of emotion that these realizations stirred within me.
This is the humanity you provoked from my spirit,I accused her.The humanity that drove me to make insane decisions.
Ones that had led to catastrophic events.
I bit down on my cheek and pulled my face away from her neck. “We’re going to figure this out, lioness. Together. As a mated pair.”As king and queen.
Except… I wasn’t sure I wanted to lead.
What point was there? This world wasn’t my vision. And I couldn’t say what my vision would be even if I were in charge.
I just want Ismerelda, I thought.I have no need for immortal blood bags, not with anErosita. I’m also more than fine maintaining this link between our souls.
So what use did I have for a world of human slaves?
That outlook might change slightly if Ismerelda wanted to become a vampire, but we didn’t need to rule for her to be my queen.
“What do you think, darling?” I asked her softly. “Do you want to run away from it all? Build a cabin high up in the mountains and hide from this fucked-up world?”
That was what I should have done over a century ago. Instead, my arrogant former self had tried to reason with Lilith.
Why?I wondered for the thousandth time.
Ismerelda’s mind tried to repeat the reasoning, to show me links to my humanity. But I shoved it all away, irritated by that truth.
This had gone deeper than a need to protect humans.
Why me?I thought.Why go alone?
Because I was confident that would be enough. And yet, if that were true, I wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of staging Ismerelda’s death.
