Page 33 of The Kingdom's Reckoning
Silence fell between them, and she wondered if Graeson could sense its weight too. The quiet had never been uncomfortable between them before, so it was strange how heavy it bore on her shoulders now. Was this because of the soul bond? Did it intensify her guilt? Could it do that even though she hadn’t accepted it?
"Kalisandre, I—" Graeson swallowed the rest of the statement as his gaze dipped to her hands.
Her gaze followed his, landing on her fingers. She stood twisting the ring round and round.
Gingerly, he grabbed her hand, his touch delicate and barely there. He swiped his finger over the ring. "I need to tell you something."
The hair on the back of her neck stood upright at those words. She went to speak, to prevent him from saying whatever it was, but he was quicker than she was.
"This ring wasn’t your mother’s."
Kallie took a step back, her hand falling from his. "Yes, it was. It?—"
Her mouth slammed shut as she looked at him. His expression was contorted with pain. He was telling the truth. Kallie gripped the railing as her legs threatened to give out.
When Graeson spoke, his voice shook. "There are two parts to the bond. The first is when both parties recognize the bond exists between each other and accept it. The second…" He hesitated, his gaze once again falling to the ring. "The second involves fortifying the bond. Once a pair recognizes the bond, often the next step is to exchange a set of?—"
Kallie was already shaking her head and retreating further up the stairs. Her heel hit the back of the step, and she tightened her grip on the railing to stop herself from falling.
"—special rings made from a rare material off the coast of Pontia. The loved ones of the pair, typically the parents, are the ones who gather the metal from the coast and forge the rings together. It’s a symbol of the two families, the two lines becoming one. That ring?—"
"Stop," Kallie blurted, holding up her hand. She gaped at the amethyst stone in the middle of her ring staring back at her. She quickly dropped her hand and squeezed her eyes shut. "Stop."
But Graeson didn’t stop. He kept going.
"I should have told you the first time I saw you wearing it, but I didn’t—Icouldn’t.Our mothers made that ring together, just like they made this one," he said, twisting one of the more worn rings around his finger. "The metal is imbued with some of Pontanius’ magic, strengthening the bonds. It is a tradition that the parents forge them."
Graeson looked down at the ring that sparkled in the light of the candles adorning the hallway. "When I saw that you still had it the first time I saw you, I was shocked. I had thought it would have been taken from you when Domitius had stolen you from us."
Kallie’s gaze fell to the ring. Her deep blue eyes widened, and her chest rose as she inhaled sharply.
"Are you saying…" She swallowed, her words getting stuck in her throat. "Are you saying that we’re already…" She couldn’t say the words aloud. She had thought she had a choice. She had thought?—
"No, no," Graeson stammered, taking a cautious step toward her.
Kallie stepped backward.
He ran his hands through his hair as if to stop himself from reaching out to her. "We’re not…we haven’t cemented the bond. You can still deny it if you wish. I just…I wanted you to know the truth about the ring, just in case…"
Her breathing became shaky. It shouldn’t have mattered. It shouldn’t have changed anything. Yet it felt as if someone had thrust their hand in her chest and was clutching her heart, threatening to crush it.
"While your mother and father both had a part in creating this ring, it has always been yours, Kalisandre. I know you haven’t made a choice," Graeson added, "and I want you to take the time to make it. But what I don’t want is for you to push me away. I can already feel you doing it. I can already feel…" Graeson squeezed his eyes shut, and a million emotions rushed across his features.
Kallie told her body to move, to flee. She tried to turn around to escape before he opened his eyes. But the moment she lifted her foot, it was too late. His silver eyes were on her, locking her in place.
"Are we going to pretend that the other night never happened?"
She folded her hands behind her back and steeled her expression as she ran a finger across the stone. She thought of Dani’s words, her warning. Kallie couldn’t explain how muchthat night meant to her. Not now. She tugged on the ring, pulling it free. "That night was a mistake."
"A mistake?"
Kallie fisted the ring in her hand, the stone digging into her flesh. "It should never have happened. I warned you nothing would change, and if you think something has, then you only have yourself to blame."
Her heart cracked at the lie, the shattered pieces crumbling and falling to the bottom of her stomach. She had to do it, though. She needed to push him away. The more time she spent with Graeson, the more likely she was to accept the bond. But accepting it would only cause Graeson more pain.
So, despite not wanting to, she met his gaze. He needed to believe her. He needed to let her walk away.
"This isn’t some fairytale, Graeson."
