Page 23 of Be Your Somebody
Play at the playground
Hang out by the dock
Stargaze *make sure to include her favorite snacks*
Bake cookies together
Asher rips out the paper and hands it over to me. Thinking of these things in my head is one thing, but seeing them on paper makes them feel real. Despite the air conditioning, my body feels hot and my heart rate accelerates. I expected only to feel panic at this plan, but there was excitement, as well. I look up from the paper, knowing this might just work, but still, I need some reassurance. I’m nervous that she’ll think my idea is stupid.
“What do you guys think? You think it’ll work?” I ask, my voice wavering with uncertainty.
“It feels like you took my advice seriously, so I’m cool with it,” Asher responds.
“Knowing Avery, I think that’ll work. It’s like a best friend bootcamp.” Max shrugs. I whip my head in his direction.
“Best friend bootcamp? That’s genius. Thanks, man. And to be clear, it’s just to rekindle my friendship. Besides, I doubt she’d want me in that way.”
“That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard,” Max deadpans. “Avery’s into you.”
“It's true. I mean, Giselle hooked up with you, so clearly, you aren't hideous. That woman is picky,” Asher chimes in.
“He hooked up with Giselle?” Max is shocked, but there is a quick flash of something before it disappears. Asher just nods his head with a smirk on his face. He totally saw that look on Max's face, too. “That was stupid as hell, dude. I hope you plan to stay away from her. Okay, now let's get back to this list. When you get to the part about baking cookies, get messy. Rub some cookie dough on her face and neck. Hell, have a food fight. Nowthatsounds hot as fuck. Then you’ll have an excuse to lick it off of her, and if things progress from there, well, you’re welcome.” Max is so much like his sister, Bri. It's scary.
“Yeah, let me do just that. Avery willdefinitelylet me lick the cookie dough off her body.” I laugh at the ridiculousness of it all.
“Trust me, she’ll love it,” Max says.
I glance at Asher with acan you believe this guyface, but he’s nodding in agreement with Max. “Sorry, dude, but I agree. From what you’ve told me, I think she’ll let you lick it off of her.”
The rest of the evening fills with laughter, and Max and Asher plotting how to move me out of the friend zone with Avery. Making friends as an adult is hard. Almost everyone you come in contact with already has their set friends, like Max and Asher. Yet, they want to take me in and include me. All of my friendships in the past, besides Avery, have been surrounded by drugs and lies. Am I going all in with the two people in front of me? No, but I am trying to allow myself to have these types of friendships.
As I walk out of the bar and towards my car, I see a shadow pass out of my peripheral vision, causing me to feel like a deer in headlights. My breathing becomes heavy as I prepare for whoever is there to approach me. But nothing happens, making me think that I imagined the shadow. I don’t let out the breath I’ve been holding until I pull away from the bar parking lot.
I head home, thinking about the friendship I’m creating with Max and Asher. It feels incredible to be myself around them and have them accept me without hesitation. They know of my past issues and still want to be around me. While productive, this day has been emotionally draining and I’m exhausted.
I start to get ready for bed, but then I remember my conversation with Asher about my interests. I glance at my closet, knowing my camera is likely collecting dust. Before I lose motivation, I move toward the box in the closet, and as I pull it out, an album falls to the floor. I pick up the black, leather-bound book and move toward my bed, placing my camera on the nightstand. I haven’t seen this thing in ages. I flip through the book and see a plethora of pictures.
Some are photos of my grandparents dancing in the kitchen. Others are landscapes and sunsets. But the ones that stick out the most are of the person I’m trying to win back. There’s one in particular that stands out to me the most. It’s at our spot on the dock; the sky is a mix of reds, yellows, and pinks blended seamlessly. Avery is sitting at the edge of the dock wearing a yellow sundress with daisies on it, her hair in a loose ponytail. Curly tendrils escape her hairband to frame her face. She looks to be aggressively writing in one of her many journals, her tonguepeeking out in concentration. I run my fingers over the photo. She looks radiant. Looking at this still image of Avery, I notice inspiration bubbling within me. I want to capture every moment with her. I want to stare at these photos years down the road and be able to remember everything.
Max’s words about Avery being into me replay in my mind as I lay in bed. Would trying to be more with Avery would be such a terrible idea? Does she want to be more than friends as severely as I do? I push those thoughts aside, knowing that self-doubt isn’t too far behind and I’m too tired to think. I crawl into bed and prepare for the inevitable nightmares.
Chapter 16
Avery
