Page 36 of Be Your Somebody
“Now?”
“Yeah, why are you interested in me like this now?”
“Baby, it's not just now. I’ve always wanted to do this.”
Always.That word has warmth radiating throughout my body.Always, I repeat in my mind. Could we have been doing something like this all along? As soon as the question enters my mind, I know the answer. No, we couldn’t have been. We both had to go our own way first before coming together.
Instead of responding to his comment, I snuggle in deeper. He presses a chaste kiss on top of my head. This isn’t something new. He’s kissed my head before, but given everything that’s happened today, it feels like more.
The movie ends too soon, yet we still haven’t moved from our spots on the couch. His fingertips run down the length of my arm and back up again. I let out a soft hum and my eyes flutter closed. I was content with taking a nap with Cas wrapped around me, but his words have me jumping out of his embrace.
“Avery, will you go on a date with me?”
There is a computer glitch in my brain and it takes me a moment to speak.
“Yes.” Simple, yet powerful enough of a response.
“Perfect, I’ll pick you up tomorrow at seven.” He sends me a flirty smile and a wink before getting up to leave.
“Wait, what am I supposed to wear? Wait, don’t you want to try the cookies?” He looks over his shoulder and smirks at me.
“I already got my taste of the cookies, and I liked it—a lot. As far as what to wear, you look sexy in anything you put on,” Cas says. And with that, he walks out the door.
Holy shit. I’m going on a date with Cas. My neck still feels hot and tingly from where he licked it. I abandon the cookiesand kitchen mess altogether and run upstairs to tear through my closet. Now that this is happening, I need to look my absolute best.
Chapter 23
Cassidy
Therapy is lifesaving
Todayismyfirstdate with Avery. Instead of excitement filling my body, I feel disconnected. It’s as if I’m watching my body from afar. Why does this have to happen today, of all days? My phone pings with a reminder to leave for my therapy session in twenty minutes. Maybe Dr. Z can help me figure out what the hell is going on during therapy today. I’m in a daze driving to therapy as my thoughts drift back to my first session.
First Therapy Session
I didn’t want to be here. A therapist wasn’t going to help me. I was too damaged. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting as I walked into the building, but it wasn’t this. The waiting room consisted of two overstuffed, chocolatey-brown chairs with a wooden coffee table in the same color directly in front. As soon as I sat down, the couch completely enveloped me, almost like it was trying to tell me I was safe. The walls were a soft white or cream color, I couldn’t tell from the dim lighting. Soft meditation music drifted through the speakers, bathing me in a tranquility that helped regulate my breathing. The peacefulness of the space threatened to lull me to sleep, but the door opened and out walked a woman. She seemed to be in her mid-thirties with wavy brown hair and eyes so blue they were almost transparent. Her smile was warm and genuine. Before my brain could process what it was doing, I was on my feet.
“Hello, you must be Cassidy. My name is Dr. Z,” she said, reaching out her hand. When my hand grasped hers, the remaining tension I had held in my body melted out of me.
“Hi,” was all I managed to get out.
“If you’re ready, you can follow me,” she said. Dr. Z gave me the choice to enter the room or leave. I nodded my head and followed her into the room she’d gestured to. Her office had hunter-green walls with random quotes scattered across them and two velvety, dark brown chairs that looked soft and inviting. An oil diffuser sat in the corner and next to it a basket that I assumed held every oil imaginable.
The therapist must have caught me looking, because she spoke. “Feel free to get up and pick a scent or two. I have a booklet in the little drawer underneath if you want a specific scent combination.” Her voice was as smooth as butter with undertones of patience and understanding.
I flipped through the booklet and noticed various combinations, from relaxation to sleep to memory enhancer and, finally, anxiety relief. After mixing the proper drops into the diffuser, I turned it on and allowed the smells to hit my senses. Who knew the combination of lavender, roman chamomile, and clove would be relaxing? I sat back down, ready to get this session over with.
“So, have you been to therapy before?” she asked.
“Yeah, during my treatment last year, but that was for my addiction issues. I've never really focused on my mental health before,” I replied.
She nodded her head and continued. “That's great that you took the opportunity to heal. I know this can be intimidating. The fact that you showed up today is huge. Our first session will be mostly information gathering so I can help find the proper diagnosis and treatment plan for you.”
“Diagnosis?” I panicked. “I thought I was just coming here to talk. Why do you need to diagnose me? People will think I'm crazy,” I stammered while looking for my exit.
“Mental health is nothing to be ashamed about. It’s more common than most like to believe it is. I have had my own battles with mental health,” Dr. Z tried to reassure me, but it confused me instead.
“You have mental health battles? How is that possible? You’re a therapist. You aren’t supposed to have problems,” I said, completely dumbfounded.
