Page 74 of Under Control
“Hello, Derek.”
People moved around them in a blur of movement and sound, but for Derek, time had stopped and all he could do was look into Olivia’s gorgeous eyes and see his own hurt reflected back at him. He wanted to make that pain go away. Pull her into his arms. Kiss her. Tell her he was sorry and that he loved her and whatever else he had to say to make her smile at him again.
“Jess made some last-minute changes to the seating arrangement,” she said in a voice he had to strain to hear. “Amber’s going to sit with you because you’re not only a firefighter, but together you’re a family who was helped by the organization and that’s very powerful.”
He didn’t care. He didn’t want to talk about the charity and trying to poke at a man’s emotions until he opened his wallet. He wanted to talk aboutthem.
“Did you ask her to do it?” He wasn’t sure why he asked, except wanting to gauge how much effort she was putting into avoiding him.
“No.”
He nodded slowly. It had been obvious since he walked through the door that word had discreetly gone around. Not a single person, other than Scott, had mentioned Olivia to him, but nobody seemed surprised by the distance between them.
“You look amazing tonight,” he said.
“Thank you.” When her eyes started to shimmer, she sniffed and lifted her chin. “I’m going to find my seat. Enjoy your dinner.”
There was not a snowball’s chance in hell of that. “You, too.”
Letting her walk away was one of the hardest things he’d ever done, but this wasn’t the time or place. He wasn’t sure therewasa time or place, since nothing had changed in either of their lives since the last, awful time they spoke.
Nothing except not having her in it.
He sat in the chair next to his ex-wife, thankful the others hadn’t found the table yet, and took a long drink from the fancy glass of ice water sitting next to his place setting. His mouth was dry and his throat felt so tight, it took everything he had not to loosen his tie and pop his top button.
“Derek, what did you do?” she leaned over to whisper. It hurt so much to even think about it, he wasn’t sure he could say the words out loud. Fortunately, Amber knew him well enough to read his face, so he didn’t have to. “Is it true that you guys aren’t together anymore?”
He nodded slowly, staring at the condensation on his glass. “Yeah, it’s true.”
“Maybe you should go home. I’ll tell them you had a headache. Or that you got called out or something. It’s not like we haven’t used that one before.”
“It might be hard to explain why the other guys from the station who came don’t leave with me.” They would, if he asked them to back up his lie. But this night was too important to his family and to all the families Village Hearts helped. “I’m good.”
“Okay, because I think that guy coming over here is who we’re supposed to charm over dinner.”
He inhaled slowly and held the breath for a few seconds before blowing it out. Then he drank some more water. “I’ve got this.”
And he’d get through dinner because he’d made up his mind that he and Olivia were going to talk. Probably not tonight because it wasn’t the place, but they were going to sit down and talk about their relationship when their emotions weren’t heated and they could be calm.
He wasn’t letting them end like this.
* * *
After dinner, the lights dimmed and the music started. They’d be interrupting over the course of the evening to auction off big-ticket items, but for the most part Olivia could linger in the shadows until she’d had enough and make her escape.
She should have left already. Seeing Derek was probably one of the most painful things she’d ever endured, and yet she couldn’t bring herself to leave. It hurt like hell to see him across the room, but at least she was seeing him.
Jess found her and handed her a glass of wine. “You okay?”
“I will be.” She always was. “Thank you for switching the seating chart. I don’t know if I could have done it.”
“It was no problem. What happened between you two, anyway? When I heard it was over, I couldn’t believe it and I’m heartbroken for you.”
She could hear the genuine concern in Jess’s voice and she appreciated it, but Olivia didn’t want to relive her breakup right now, so she just shook her head. “The dragons won this one. That’s all.”
“No.” Jess gripped her arm. “No, that’s not all. Slaying the dragons to get your happily-ever-after isn’t one battle. You don’t put down your sword the first time you get singed.”
There was no amusement in her short bark of laughter. “I didn’t get singed, Jess. I went down in flames.”
