Page 7 of Through The Rain
“I know, but these go together, so it would be dumb not to join them up just because the edge pieces aren’t done yet.”
“It’s not dumb. We do the border first and then the inside pieces.”
He reached across the table and fit together two pieces that were part of a flag and obviously went together. She’d already seen those two, of course, and she’d planned to join them as soon as she was done with the boring sky pieces of the top edge.
“You’re doing it on purpose now,” she said. “We’ve always done the outside pieces first.”
“Yeah, we also used to be married. Things change.”
The flat way he said the words made her heart ache, annoying her. “Technically we’re still married, so technically we can still do the outside pieces first.”
She could feel him tense—knew he wanted nothing more in that moment than to get up and walk out of the cabin—but he had nowhere to go. Without saying another word, he took a few of the sky-colored edge pieces and tried to fit them together.
Emily was fairly certain he’d taken the piece she’d been looking for, but she didn’t bother saying so. She’d wait until he figured out the sky pieces and then they could start on the fun parts of the puzzle.
She realized she was trying to twist non-existent wedding bands again and looked down at her hands. It was a new habit, something she did without conscious thought. Nothing had made Emily more aware of how often she had fiddled with her wedding rings than not wearing them for three months.
Now she constantly caught herself rubbing the pale circle of skin set off by the slightest of ridges. She wondered how long it would take for the marks left by twenty-two years of wearing the beautiful diamond solitaire and simple gold band to fade.
“Stop it.”
Scott’s voice was a harsh bark, a tone he rarely used, and she looked up at him, frowning. “Stop what?”
“Rubbing the spot where your wedding rings used to be.”
“Just a habit, I guess.” She clasped her hands in her lap, not because he’d told her to stop, but because she didn’t want him to know how much she missed wearing them. “I don’t know why it’s any of your business, though.”
For a long moment, she didn’t think he was going to respond, but he cleared his throat, and it was loud in the quiet cabin. “Because every time you do that, I think about putting those rings on your finger and it hurts.”
It was the first emotion she’d seen from him—the first crack in the wall he liked to hide his feelings behind—and Emily’s eyes filled with tears as the ragged pain in his voice echoed through her mind. “So you do care.”
He lifted his head and their gazes locked. The intensity of the emotion in his eyes made her shiver. “Of course I care. Emily, you’re my wife and I love you. How could you think I don’t care that our marriage is over?”
You’re my wife and I love you. Those words should have thrilled her, but all they did was stoke her anger. “How was I supposed to know you cared, Scott? Do you remember what you said when I told you I was done—that I couldn’t do this anymore? Do you remember what you said to me?”
“Yes,” he said, looking down at the puzzle again. But he didn’t reach for any of the pieces.
“Fine.” She swiped angrily at her cheeks. “That was all you had to say. I’ve seen you give more of a reaction to a server asking you if your steak was cooked right.”
“What did you want me to say?” His anger was showing through now, too. “Every day I did my best to be a good husband and a good father, and I told you I love you. Maybe not every day, but I told you that. So what was I supposed to say in that moment that was going to change your mind? If what I was doing wasn’t enough, what was I supposed to say, Emily?”
She had to swallow past the lump of emotion in her throat before she could talk, and her voice was rough. “If you had just looked at me in that moment the way you’re looking at me right now—if you’d let me see you cared—it might have been enough.”
CHAPTER 4
Scott hadn’t meant to start this. He got up, unable to keep still a moment longer, but he had nowhere to go. Rain drummed on the roof and the wind lashed it against the windows. He couldn’t even go out to the porch to get away from the tension.
“You know I’m not an expressive guy when it comes to feelings.”
“Oh, I think you do okay at that. Just not with me.”
The flush of shame at having been caught laughing—and only laughing—with another woman made no sense, but he felt it anyway. He was tired of apologizing for something he didn’t do. “Tell me we’re not going to talk about that stupid picture again.”
“The only stupid thing about that picture was how stupid I felt when Dee texted it to me and asked if you and I had split up.”
“Jesus, Emily. I’m exhausted. I can’t even make my own wife happy, so why the hell would I go looking for another woman to throw in the mix?”
“I don’t know. Maybe for some other woman, you’d actually make an effort?”
