Page 48 of Sean
“Let’s bless our food.”Bobbie reached out a hand, smiling when Monica stretched hers forward.“Jesus, I’m thankful for the chance to have a meal with my friend.I ask that You’ll bless our food and our conversation.More than that, help us find the answers that we need.I’m grateful that You never leave us floundering.You’ve shown me more than once what a miracle worker You are, even in the direst of circumstances.Have Your way in this place.”
Monica waited until Bobbie whispered an amen before looking up.“Dire circumstances?Sounds like you have your own story to share.”
“More than one, but we aren’t here to talk about me.”
“Indulge me just while we eat.I’ve given you the high points of my problems.Hearing your story might help me focus on mine.I promise I won’t let it sidetrack me.”
“If I tell you my story, you’ll tell me yours...all of it?”
“Yes,” Monica promised.
Bobbie’s narrowed eyes and skeptical expression spoke volumes, but she took a bite of her burger, staring off into a distance only she could see.“I was kidnapped when I was three.”
She said it with so little intonation that Monica thought she was joking, but when Bobbie’s gaze met hers, Monica saw truth in her eyes.
“I don’t remember a lot of what happened, but I remember the guardian angel that went with me.”Her smile brightened.“Jem.I haven’t thought of him in a while, but I will never forget him.”
“You had a guardian angel named Jim?”Monica asked.
“Jem not Jim.”Bobbie spelled it out.“I looked it up a few years ago.In Hebrew, it can mean one who follows or is sent by God.Either definition fits his role in my life.He convinced the kidnapper to bring me home.”She grinned.“Now that kidnapper is a friend of the family.He saved my aunt Iris’s life.”
“Wow.”It wasn’t much but it was the only response Monica could think of.
“So I know firsthand that God never leaves us alone.He has an answer for every situation, even if His methods seem unorthodox.”She swirled a fry in ketchup.“Your turn.”
“My turn?You were kidnapped when you were three and now he’s a family friend.That’s it?”
“For now.I really do want to get to the whole Sean thing, but while I have you here, and over a barrel, I have a few questions that need answers.”
“Fire away,” Monica said.“But I’m sure it won’t beat a kidnapping.”
“Maybe, maybe not.A few minutes ago, you mentioned having a lot on your plate.While I admire your willingness to get involved, I feel the need to remind you that your overloaded plate is your choice.Why are you determined to fill every waking moment with activity?”
Monica swallowed her bite, then started to give the first answer that came to mind.She wanted to help.When she saw a need, she tried to fill it.She had time and hands, and she felt like she was honoring God when she used them to bless other people.
All that was true.
But the words didn’t come.
Because her friend’s question resonated.Every waking moment.Did she really do that?Considering this was the only free hour of her weekend, she had to admit that she did.But why?
That was Bobbie’s question.Why?
The real answer wasn’t a desire to please God or serve the community.The real answer was simpler—and loads more complicated.“My dad.”
Bobbie’s eyebrows hiked.“Tell me about him.”
“I lost my mom when I was twelve.Dad always said that Mom was one of the pillars of our community—always ready to volunteer for a good cause, always on the staff of several local charities.When she died, Dad took over times three.He said it was his way of coping with her loss and honoring her legacy.I wanted to do the same thing, you know?To honor her legacy and...”When her answer started to feel less than true, she paused and sipped her drink.Maybe that was how she’d started down this path.But again, Bobbie’s question resonated.Why was she still on it?Why was she so overloaded she couldn’t think?
“Daddy was never as proud of me as when I was doing something for others.”The words came slowly as she considered each one.“I remember making the principal’s honor roll in high school, and all I got out of him was a smile.But if I volunteered at the local food bank or ran for class president, he acted like I’d made a solo climb to the summit of Mount Everest.”Examples were coming in flashes—her selfless acts followed by Dad’s words of praise.“I asked him once why he didn’t seem to care as much about my achievements, and he said the honor roll was nice but it was forme.That what I did for others was what counted.He got sick my senior year.When I tried to back out of some of my obligations to take care of him, he shooed me out of the house, insisting that I not let my responsibilities slip.I guess, once he passed, I kept doing all the things.Kept busy.Kept volunteering.
“That’s part of my dilemma with this whole Sean versus Arizona thing.I want a relationship with Sean, but giving up my opportunity to work for Matthew Wright, a man who changes lives every time he speaks...It feels selfish.I have a chance to do a lot of good for a lot of people.And if I go, God will bless my sacrifice, right?”
Bobbie didn’t agree.She didn’t say anything, just studied her as if she’d just discovered a huge wart on her nose.
Monica squirmed under her friend’s scrutiny.
Bobbie stirred her drink silently as if measuring her response.“You know, when it comes to your activities,” her words were slow and thoughtful—“you have to follow where the Lord leads.The Bible doesn’t use the wordsself care, but it does use the wordresta lot.Jesus invited His disciples to come away with Him and rest for the work ahead.The twenty-third Psalm mentions lying down in a green pasture and having your soul restored.And of course, there’s the Sabbath.We’re commanded to take a day off every week.I think, when we do that, we’re learning to trust that God has the world under control.It can live without our contribution for one day.”
