Page 102 of Things We Never Said
‘Without Catherine here to share it ...’ Maggie says, understandingly. ‘It’s bound to be.’
By way of reply, Sean simply blinks slowly and nods.
‘Yes,’ Maggie says. ‘That must be hard. That must be really hard.’
‘But they’re all fine,’ Sean says, forcing an upbeat tone. ‘That’s the main thing. April, Ronan, Jake. They’re their own little family now.’ He shakes his head as if he can hardly believe it’s true.
‘April said you didn’t much like Jake. As a name, I mean.’
Sean sighs and peers into Maggie’s eyes. He wonders if she knows the reason why. But the expression that meets his own seems innocent enough. Innocent, naive, warm ...
‘Did you ever finish those tapes?’ Maggie asks as if she’s been listening to his thoughts.
‘Yes,’ Sean says. ‘Yes, I did, actually.’
‘Were there any more revelations?’
Sean laughs. ‘Yes,’ he says. ‘Yes, there were quite a few.’
Maggie nods. She waits for a moment for Sean to continue, but then, visibly realising that he isn’t going to, she says, hesitantly, ‘Right. Well ... good. That you finished them, I mean.’
‘You know ...’ Sean starts.
‘Yes?’
‘Oh, nothing,’ he says, wrinkling his nose. ‘It’s just a silly thing Catherine said.’
‘No, go on.’
Sean shakes his head. ‘Really!’ he says. ‘Best not.’
Maggie tuts and rolls her eyes. ‘You’re such a tease. You always were.’
‘A tease?’
‘Yes, a tease. You know it drives me insane when people start to tell me something and then change their minds. I’ll now drive myself mad for weeks trying to guess what it was you were going to say.’
‘Really?’
‘Really.’
‘OK, then,’ Sean says. ‘You asked for it. There was one revelation, as you call them, that involved you, actually.’
‘Me?’ Maggie says. ‘Oh, you mean the supposed affair I had with you? You already told me about that.’
‘No, she changed her mind about that, actually. She didn’t think we’d had an affair after all. Not in the end.’
‘Oh,’ Maggie says, softly. ‘Well, that’s a relief. I hated the idea that she’d ... you know ... thought that the whole time.’
‘But she did think that you might be in love with me,’ Sean says, letting the words rush out before he can change his mind.
Maggie frowns at Sean deeply, then opens her mouth to reply before closing it again and glancing towards the door of the café instead. Finally, she looks back and says, in a very matter-of-fact tone of voice, ‘Well, it makes sense, I suppose. Seeing as she thought we had an affair and everything.’
‘Yes, but like I said, she changed her mind about that. She just thought it was some sort of unrequited-love thing between us, I think. Something we’d never dared talk about. Or even thought about, even.’
‘Really?’ Maggie says. She blushes and looks down at her cup and saucer for a moment. She fiddles with her teaspoon. ‘I’m ... I’m not sure quite what to say to that.’
‘Nothing, I suppose,’ Sean says with fake disinterest. ‘I mean, there’s nothing to say, really, is there? Especially if it’s not true. Especially if she got that wrong, I mean.’
