Page 21 of Longing for the Minotaur
“Val…” Banon grips the steering wheel tighter. “We can’t do this. I stayed up all night thinking about it, and I decided. We can’t.”
I knew it. I knew it was all too good, too right, and I couldn’t have that. Not with him.
“Cool.” I don’t know what else to say. “You decided on your own. So you’re gonna use me and toss me, like every girl you’ve ever fucked. Got it.”
His head swivels toward me. “It’s not like that.”
“Then how is it?” I am trying my damnedest not to cry, because he doesn’t deserve my tears. “Please, explain it to me. Howyoucame to my room. Howyoutold me beautiful lies, and now you regret it. Tell me all about it.”
He sets his broad teeth together and hisses between them. “We’ll be ostracized! Everyone will judge us. It will be a war all our lives just to be recognized. And that doesn’t even count my mom and your dad—what wouldtheysay? Wouldn’t they be… disgusted with us?”
He’s panting after laying it all out on the table. Of course, I know that he’s right. I didn’t want to think about it too hard, but it would be an uphill battle for us. Still, I wanted to try. I wanted to fight for this, because I thought I could believe in it.
But he doesn’t.
“I’m sorry,” he says, bowing his head. “I’m sorry I came to your room. I should never have said what I said on the park bench.”
It hurts even more, knowing that he regrets it.
“Valentina.” Banon turns fully in his seat, checking out the window over my shoulder before he leans down toward me. “I didn’t lie about anything. I love you. But I can’t have you.”
I don’t need to put up with this.
“If you loved me, you would try for me,” I say, getting my wits about me again. “I don’t care whether the world knows or not.”
I pull away from him, grabbing my backpack out of the footwell. I’m over this.
“You’d keep it a secret?” he asks as I grab the door handle. “You’d want that?”
I could just shake him.
“I wantyou.” I glare over my shoulder. “That’s it, Banon. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. I would rather have that than pretending nothing ever happened, and spending my whole life wondering what could have been.”
He’s quiet, simply watching me, his eyes searching mine for something. I know he knows it—the way we fit together, how it was life-altering in a way that can never be undone. What we did was irreversible, and we’ll both be haunted by it forever.
The sternness on Banon’s face falters, and he buckles forward.
“Whatever I have to do,” he says, sounding choked. “If I get to keep you, I’ll do it. If it means I never tell another soul about you, I’ll do it.” He reaches out and grabs my hand, squeezing it like it’s his very last lifeline. “I’m sorry, Val. All I want is to keep you safe. I don’t want you to destroy your reputation for me.” He squints. “I already did that once.”
“Then no one will find out.” I peek out the window, too, to make sure we’re alone before putting my hands on his big muzzle and pulling him in for a kiss. It’s quick, so we don’t get caught, but exactly what I needed.
Putting on my backpack, I open the car door and step out.
“Next time Rich is gone at his girlfriend’s place,” Banon says in a low voice, “do you want to come over?”
“Just text me.” I hold up my phone. “I’ll be ready.”
I’m in my Calculus II class the next Monday when my phone buzzes in my pocket.
Rich is going on a date and won’t be back. Could I pick you up?
I glance at the prof before answering.
I’ll be ready at six.
Great. I’ll grab dinner on the way.
I’m buzzing throughout the rest of my classes, eager to get back to my room and change. I have the perfect bra and panty set, much cuter than what I was wearing the other night, though I doubt I’ll be wearing them for long.
