Page 67 of Crawl
“No. A girl like you wants it in the ass. Dad told me how wet you got when he fucked you there.”
I grit my teeth. Anger swells inside of me, threatening to boil over, to showhimwhat it’s like to be powerless, like his dad made me. But Brody is mostly bluster; one punch, one blow, one kick, then his conscience kicks into gear and he lets me go. I should endure it like I always do.
But the taste of revenge is thick in my throat like the sour taste of alcohol. Iwantto kill him. He thinks I’m the same little girl I was years ago, but I’m not. I killed his father, and I amnotafraid of him.
But I can’t overpower him. All I have is my voice.
“You never learned how to get a girl wet, did you?” I snap. “Maybe you’ll end up like your daddy. Raping little girls since no one wants to fuck you.”
He huffs through his teeth and I brace myself for his blow, but his eyes widen as he clenches my shirt, and we’re both pulled back, knocked off balance. He lets go of me and swings around to see who tore him off of me.
Cash glares down at him, his eyes full of fire. The dark spots in his eyes are like black clouds of smoke and ash, threatening to consume everything. I glance behind him; the hatch is open in the hall closet. My heart beats rapidly, and suddenly, the moral issues of the situation get to me. I can’t kill Brody, but Cash can andwill,and I don’t know if I’m actually okay with that. Brody and I fight like step-siblings who hate each other, but I don’t know if he deserves to die, when I fight him just as much as he fights me.
I whisper: “Cash—”
“Get up,” Cash says, his eyes locked on Brody.
Brody stumbles. “The hell do you want?” he asks. “Who are you?”
Cash shoves him so hard the wall cracks with his body, and when Brody goes to punch him, Cash grabs his throat until Brody chokes, his mouth sputtering with spit.
“You will never touch Remedy again,” Cash says, his voice eerily low and controlled. His knuckles are white, but there’s a calmness in his expression, like he knows exactly how he’s going to break every bone in Brody’s body. Brody paws at Cash’s hands, trying to break free, and his face transforms from bright red into a dark purple.
Brody’s lips mouth:I won’t. I won’t—
Cash drops his grip and Brody falls to the floor, coughing and clawing at his neck. He doesn’t even look at us as he races to his car. I hold my breath. Cash pulls me to my feet and I cross my arms, my mouth gaping.
I don’t know how to feel. Am I disappointed Cash didn’t kill him? Or am I relieved? Will Brody tell the police about Cash?
Cash’s eyes flicker, but the smoke and ash consume him, a dullness simmering behind his gaze like this is a matter of fact. As I search him, I realize why he didn’t kill Brody yet: he doesn’t want the evidence contaminating my rental house.
He’s protecting me.
Still, I know what I’msupposedto say. “Don’t kill him.”
“Do I need to keep you in the estate?” he asks, like he’s telling me to order more food for Bones. Like there’s nothing wrong here.
“I’m fine. But don’t do anything to him, okay?”
He nods toward the front door where a truck is parked. “I have to cancel tonight’s date,” he says. “We’ll make up for it tomorrow. I’ll see you at work.”
“Cash—”
He stops with his hand on the front doorknob.
“Don’t do anything to him,” I say. “My stepdad is the one who hurt me. Brody is just an asshole. We always hit each other. It’s what we do.”
Cash sniffs, then lifts his nose in the air. I realize my error:we always hit each other.It doesn’t matter who it is, if it’s rape or consensual or a stupid fight between ex-step-siblings. Any touch from someone else won’t be tolerated. Cash isn’t okay with sharing that part of me.
“I’ll see you later,” he says.
My gut crawls, but I follow him to the doorway. “He only hits me once, then it’s over—”
But Cash slides into his truck, then drives away, and I know there’s nothing I can do. Brody didn’t hurt me, but he did touch me, and there’s no way that Cash is going to let that go. Even if I know how to handle myself—even if I know how to handle Brody—I will never be free of Cash.
Because Cash won’t let me go.
***
