Page 85 of Reckless
27
Gage
Ron was pacing Andy’s office when I got there, sweat running down his temples.
I didn’t know quite what to say, I’d never seen Ron this upset. And Ron could get upset. I stood by the door, waiting, watching him pace.
He stopped once, turned to me, focused in on my face, and went immediately back to pacing.
I frowned, growing concerned now. “Ron, I’m sure—”
Ron’s hand shot up, effectively cutting off my words. He stopped, planted his hands on his hips and walked over to stand in front of me. “I don’t know how to tell you…I’m sorry, I…” He plunged a hand through his hair.
“Just say it, dammit. How bad is it?”
Ron’s hazel eyes lit, and he barked a laugh. “Shitty. Real shitty. I knew it was at the time, but we talked about it, and she or maybe even I convinced myself it would be the right thing to do.”
“What the fuck are you talking about, Ron?”
“When I met your mother. I was married. She was the artist we used to plan stage props back in the day. She was brilliant.”
I swallowed back the urge to make him talk faster, having a feeling I would want to knock his head off when he was finished, and knowing I’d need to let him get it all out first.
“I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did. I loved her, she loved me, I was going to leave my wife, especially when Babs found out she was pregnant. I couldn’t let her go through that alone.” Ron turned away, walked to the window.
My chest rose and fell rapidly, fists clenched at my sides.
“Then my wife got cancer. We had two other boys, and I couldn’t leave. She didn’t have any family to help.” He turned to me, his eyes shimmering like muddy emeralds, a murkier version of my own. I’d never noticed that before. “I would have given her everything and left, married your mom, but she couldn’t take care of herself and the kids. Then by the time she was well, your mom refused to even talk to me.” He stepped closer, and I flinched. “I’m sorry, son.”
Son.
I shook my head. Cleared my throat. Tried to see past the red film covering my eyes. “Sorry? Sorry for what? That you left Mom, broke, to raise a kid alone? Or you’re sorry that your sperm created me?”
“Oh shit.” Andy swung open the door, his eyes wild as he caught my last few words. He held out both hands like he was trying to tame a tiger, and I realized I must’ve looked like I was capable of committing murder. “My bad. I’ll just—”
“No,” Ron said, looking at me. “This has been a lot to take in. I’ll go. Let me know when you want to talk. I would like to know you as my son.”
I looked away as he walked out, gritting my teeth together so I wouldn’t pick the chair closest to me up and hurl it at the wall.
Andy’s eyes were huge when they settled on me. “It’s on all the news outlets, not his name, but it will be soon enough.”
“What a fucking bastard.” I wanted to curse and never stop. “You can’t love someone and never one time have anything to do with the kid you created together.”
“I’m on your side here, man, but we don’t know what happened between them or the circumstances. Babs was an independent woman, I’m sure she had her own ideas. And besides, he has been here, almost every step of the way. Now you know why.”
I wasn’t ready to listen to rational.
“He’s got a family.” My voice sounded strained. “He’s got other kids.”
Andy hissed. “I only know that your mom wouldn’t have ever been with him if he was an awful person.”
Learning my father was a man I’d known for years was enough, learning he had another family cut like a knife to the ribcage.
What the fuck did it matter? I wasn’t losing anything because I never had him anyway.
I was surprisingly okay. I was glad I knew, because now, I knew for sure that my life had been just perfect the way it was.
I’d been blessed with the best mom in the world and a great set of friends. Things could’ve turned out a completely different way if he’d left his family for Mom. Maybe, just maybe, everything happened for a reason.
