Page 12 of Reckless
“Of course, but I’d much rather be going home. There’s so much to do in the garden…”
I hoped her optimism carried some weight. No one wanted to get her out of here more than I did, but I wasn’t convinced. Mom wasn’t fully herself. It was obvious just by looking at her, something was going on.
Something bad.
Kelly turned, and with that motion, I caught a glimpse of not only the girl I left behind, but the woman she’d become. I’d been so struck by seeing her again, I guessed I’d really only seen her how she used to be, mixed with the contrast of us before that terrible night, but seven years had transformed her.
The spark that had been so Kelly was missing. I couldn’t see even a hint of the flame that had me falling in love with her practically the moment we met. It had been extinguished. Guilt slammed into me like a fist in the solar plexus. I should never have left. Should have stayed, turned down the band, for her. Whether she wanted me to or not.
I cocked my head as I watched her exit the little space, wondering if the spark that lit the Kelly I once knew was still in there at all, buried deep.
When the room quieted, and Mom’s eyes closed, my mind automatically went to my schedule, twenty more dates lined up. For the first time since I’d signed the contract with the label, I felt torn. My rock star life was reaching out, pulling me back after only hours of being absent. But for now, I wanted to stay in New Hope.
With Mom, and with Kelly too.
A few minutes later, in walked a doctor, followed by a red-eyed Kelly.
My stomach turned over as the doctor addressed Mom by name, and it was obvious that he knew her well. And that she wasn’t happy to see him.
“Babs,” he said in an entirely too familiar way. “You know what you have to do. It’s time.”
I frowned. “Time for what?” And why was her physician addressing her by her first name, as if they met on a regular basis?
“Tom, no.” Mom shook her head and stared down at the thin hospital blanket.
Panic shot through me. Mom wasn’t one to shy away from hard subjects, and that fact had me immediately on edge.
“You need to tell him. He deserves to know.”
“If I don’t want to, you can’t.” Her chin shot up, and anger burst into her eyes, burning out the dullness that’d had me on alert since I arrived. “I’ll sue your ass if you invade my privacy.”
He let out a long sigh. “Babs…”
I cleared my throat and stuck out my hand. “Doctor…”
The doctor took my hand, gave it a strong shake. “Tom Wilson. Your mother and I went to high school together. She was a firecracker now and pa…” He snapped his mouth shut, turned more than a little bit pink, then cleared his throat. “This hasn’t tamped her down a bit.”
A long sigh came from the bed. “Okay,” she said in a tiny voice that sounded nothing like her. She patted the bed next to her. “Come, Gage, sit down.”
I swallowed, fear like I’d never known making my movements stiff. But I sat and waited. Waited for the words that I knew would change my world as I knew it. “Just tell me.”
“Gage, I didn’t want to tell you, didn’t want to put a black mark on the way your life is going, but I suppose I have no choice. I have pancreatic cancer. Theprognosis, it’s not good.”
Dr. Wilson jumped in, explaining that the cancer had spread too far to be treatable, but that my mother would be made comfortable as the disease ate her alive. His words droned on and on, swimming violently as the coffee I’d guzzled this morning threatened to come back up. I’d known it wasn’t going to be good, but I never expected anything this bad. This wasn’t something that could be cured with a few pills or even aggressive treatment. According to the doctor, this was something that could…no, would take her life.
Oh God, take herlife.
And soon.
Death was something that had never touched anyone close to me other than Kelly’s family. Even when Kelly’s dad and brother had been taken, I had distanced myself from it, throwing myself into rehearsing with my new band and writing songs to expel my grief and disbelief. Now, I only had my mom, and I was being told she was going to be taken from me.
And Mom had known, had apparently taken the news in stride. She didn’t even bat an eyelid but gave me a little smile and squeezed my hand. It hit me that she’d accepted it. But I couldn’t, wouldn’t just let this happen.
Pancreatic cancer was a killer, but I wouldn’t let it kill my mother.
“Gage?” she said in a lowmomvoice.
I ground my teeth together and did what I did best, gave an order. “I need everyone to leave the room.”
