Page 9 of Falling for Him
“Stay.” I do as she says, still unsure of what is happening. “I’m gonna do this now, because I won’t have the nerve to do it tomorrow. Also, if you reject me again, I’m buzzed and I can pretend it was nothing more than a drunk illusion.”
Before I have the chance to say anything Lexi leans closer, pressing her lips to mine. I’m completely taken off guard, my entire body frozen. Everything hits me when she starts to pull away, and I lift my hand, cupping the back of her head, holding her closer. Deepening the kiss, Lexi lets out a whimper, and I drag my tongue over her lips as they part.
She tastes sweet, like the fruity drink they’d all been consuming throughout the night.
“I want to hate you, Bennett,” she whispers. “I really do.”
“But?” I repeat the same word I asked her earlier, not expecting her to give me an answer. I’m surprised when she does.
“I’ve tried to, but it all leads back to the same place, no matter how hard I try.”
“Where’s that?”
“Loving you.” My chest grows tight. “And I don’t want to love you, Bennett. I don’t want to.”
With those words, she stands and starts to back up as I reach out for her. “Goodnight, Bennett.” She leaves the way she came, and I’m left as confused as I was when she first knelt beside me.
My chest is so tight I feel like I can barely breathe.
“Did that really just happen?” someone whispers in the dark, and I glance over once Lexi disappears back upstairs to find Rory. He has the same confused look on his face that I assume I have on mine.
“I have no fucking idea, man.” It seriously feels like I dreamt the entire thing.
CHAPTER TEN
Lexi
“You don’t haveto talk about it,” I say with my elbows resting on the desk. “We can sit here in this room for the entire hour in silence if that’s what you want.”
My head is still pounding from last night’s festivities anyway, so I’d be perfectly fine with silence.
“My caseworker said things will never get better if I keep everything all bottled up,” Camryn says, staring down at her hands in her lap. A six-year-old girl with problems and fears bigger than any six-year-old should ever have to deal with. Forced to grow up much too soon. “She says that I’m angry all the time because I hold it all in.”
“Possibly.” She looks up to meet my gaze.
“Do you talk about what makes you sad?”
“Not always,” I confess. “Lately I’ve been pretty closed off. I’ve been angry and sad, but all those feelings are natural. It’s atiming thing, and only you Camryn will know when you’re ready to share what’s on your mind. Only you can decide to invite someone else in to share those things that burden you.”
“No one understands.” She looks down at her lap once more. “Everyone at school, the people I’ve met at the youth center, they don’t understand.”
“How do you know they don’t, if you’ve never shared your troubles?”
“They have parents, family, and I have no one.”
One of the hardest things about this job is seeing the heartbreak the children go through. “What happened to your parents, what you’ve seen, it’s all life-changing. How you choose to let it change you, that is all up to you. It can drag you down, ruin everything and every possibility you will be presented with. Or you can use it for good and help others, you can gain strength from those weaknesses.”
“Is that what you do?”
I stare at Camryn, feeling like a complete hypocrite. “I’ll admit Camryn, lately I myself am finding it hard to push past the darkness.”
She holds my stare then shrugs. “So maybe we can both use this time to find ways to beat the darkness.”
I smile.
“I’ve never really liked the dark,” she adds.
“Me neither,” I confess. “I like your plan, sweetheart.”
