Page 116 of Vicious Cycle
“You’re also right to call me a selfish bastard. Before Willow, I thought only of myself, and then she came along and opened me up a little. Then you came barging in and forced me to put my own needs and desires behind those I cared about.”
Reaching out, I touched her cheek. “And I do care about you, Alexandra. When I thought that I might lose you to Sigel, I thought I would die.” A shudder rippled through me. “Truth is, Iwantedto die. I don’t want to live without you. I love you too much.”
Tears shimmered in Alex’s dark eyes. “Oh Deacon.”
Dipping my head, I nipped her lips with my mine. “Now answer my question.”
With a teasing smile, Alex asked, “What question?”
I grunted. “The one about marrying me.”
“It’s a lot to ask to make an honest man out of you, Jesse James.”
With a chuckle, I replied, “You’re the only woman who ever could, White-Bred.”
“You know I’m going to want a poofy dress and a big reception.”
Inwardly, I groaned, but I gave Alex a smile. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
She cocked her brows in surprise. “Does that mean I’ll get you in a tux?”
“Not fucking likely,” I grumbled.
Alexandra leaned up on her tiptoes to brush her lips against mine. When she pulled back, she replied, “Don’t worry. I wouldn’t want you in a tux.”
“And why not?”
“It’s not who you are.”
Smiling down at her, I said, “You’re my angel—my dark haired angel.” The moment the words came out of my lips, I staggered back.
“Deacon, what’s wrong?” Alex asked with alarm.
But I was no longer with her. Instead, I was holding Preacher Man’s body. His words echoed through my mind. “Two dark haired angels are coming for you. They will be your salvation.”
Alex stared up at me in confusion. “What?”
I realized then that I had said the words aloud. “Preacher Man told me that right before he died. At the time, I couldn’t imagine what he meant. But now…”
I stared down at her beautiful face filled with love and concern for me. “Now, I understand. You and Willow—you’re the dark haired angels. You’re my salvation.” I pulled her closer to me, needing to feel her against me. “You’remy salvation,” I repeated.
“And you’re mine,” Alex answered.
I would take her home to my compound where once again I would look after her as she healed. Tomorrow I would get to see my other angel, my daughter. I knew that there were still threats looming over us, including ones the Knights, now floundering without their leader and Sergeant at Arms, would retaliate against us.
But like a phoenix fucking rising from the ashes, I’d be ready for them.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR: DEACON
For the first time I could remember, I sat at Mama Liz’s table with a plateful of delicious food in front of me, but I couldn’t eat. I didn’t have an appetite to save my life. My stomach felt like it had been hog tied with barbed wire.
It seemed that neither Rev nor Bishop, sitting across from me, could eat either. Mama Liz cleared her throat, causing us all to glance up from staring at our plates. “Boys, you really need to eat. You’re going to need your strength today.”
It didn’t matter that her “boys” were in their twenties. She was still looking after us just like we were kids. And just like she said, I knew I needed my physical strength to try to get through the emotional hell that was going to be Case’s funeral.
To appease Mama Liz, I picked up a biscuit, sopped up some gravy, and then took a bite. She gave me an appreciative smile before turning her attention back to Rev. I knew he felt the burden extra hard today. After all, he was the new President. He had to somehow manage to lead the Raiders through the shit-storm of grief.
Since we hadn’t patched in another officer yet, Bishop would be keeping his role as Road Captain. That job became even more difficult today as he had to coordinate the route from the funeral home to the cemetery with out-of-town charters as well as other clubs paying their respect. It was an awfully big job, but I knew he could do it.
