Page 50 of Property of Baffle
“Santa Fe?”I asked, knowing that was where the Penitentiary was.“It’s bad, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, honey.They found Sticky dead this morning.Last I heard, it was unclear if it was foul play or by his own hand.Baffle had to go claim the man’s belongings, not that he had much.His personal effects that were on him at the time he got picked up were available.Not sure if anything in his cell will be released because I don’t know the details of where he died.”Crutch choked up and it was only then that I remembered he and Sticky had been close friends at one time.He used to be the president and Sticky was VP back in the day.They were the previous generation’s Bigfoot and Baffle.I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him hard.
“I’m so sorry about your friend.”
“Thanks,” he muttered and then kissed the top of my head.“It’s been tough not knowing how to handle the situation.He was a club brother, one of my closest friends, and I could never rectify that man with the one who would kill the woman he loved with all his heart.”
“When everything isn’t so fresh, you should sit down with Rick and have him tell you what happened.Between what Angel’s mom let slip around her and what they learned from Sticky during their visit, I think maybe he has the full picture now, whether he wanted it or not.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“When was the last time you saw him?”I asked.
“It was a few months ago.Sticky asked me not to come see him anymore.I still put funds on his canteen account, but the bastard removed me from his approved visitor’s list.”
That was sad and made me wonder if his death hadn’t been something that was in the works for awhile.I contemplated that while keeping my arms awkwardly wrapped around Crutch - thanks to my own crutches that dangled from my hands.I figured he needed the hug as much as I did.I just let go of Crutch when I noticed my husband’s Harley ride past us.He didn’t stop or slow at the sight of all of us.Instead, he pushed on straight for the travel trailer his sister lived in.
After he got there, Brady made his way out and slowly walked over to lean on Angel’s truck.He didn’t leave, which meant he felt like she would still need someone there after her brother delivered whatever news he brought with him.Bigfoot rolled up as well but parked his motorcycle over near where everyone else was gathered, so Crutch and I disentangled my paint-splattered walking aids and slowly made our way back over there.
Before long, everyone except Knuckles took off to head back to the clubhouse.He stayed because I refused to go until Rick came back out of Angel’s place.I was worried about both of them.I couldn’t leave in case my husband, sister-in-law, or the combination of the two needed me to be there.I waited by the shop instead of heading over there because I also didn’t want to intrude on their sibling time together, especially when I knew that they would both be grieving in their own way.
About an hour later, Brady walked back inside as my husband came out and hopped on his motorcycle.He almost passed right by us until he glanced to the side at the last minute.As soon as he realized I was still hanging around despite the sun having set already, he pulled in and tipped his chin up at Knuckles.
“Thanks for waiting with her, brother.”
“You got her now?”Was all Knuckles asked.When he received another tip of Baffles chin, he climbed in the UTV and took off.
“There goes my ride,” I said as my lip poked out.
Rick glanced from me to the pillion seat on his Harley and back toward me again.“Does that make me chopped fucking liver?”
I shifted so that all my weight was balanced on my good leg and then thrust my crutches out toward my husband.“Well, I have accessories right now that need to come with me.Getting on and off that thing doesn’t look like it will be very easy with my giant leg attachment.”
Rick chuckled as he threw the kickstand down and hopped off his bike.“Come here,” he demanded.I hobbled over as he pulled some rope out of one of his saddle bags.He had me lean into his body as he tied my crutches to the back of his Harley and then he picked me up and placed me on the pillion seat.Once I was secure, he carefully moved in front of me and slid his leg over, kicked the stand up, and cranked the engine.
“Alright, sweetheart.Need your arms wrapped tight around me ’til we get to the clubhouse.”
I slid in close and did just that.The bottom would drop out soon enough because Rick had to be affected by his father’s passing, so for now, I’d hold on tight and later, I’d do it all over again if he decided to fall apart in front of me.
After we got backto the clubhouse, it felt somewhat unreal how low-key the vibe was inside.The music was barely a whisper and voices in the common area matched the somber tone.Rick led the way back to where our bedroom was.We bypassed everyone and they all watched us go without saying a word.Likewise, neither of us acknowledged anyone as we passed.Once we were behind closed doors, he turned, locked it, and pulled my crutches from my arms to lean them against the wall.
My husband then pulled my tank top off, slipped the bra from my body, and methodically continued to strip me until the only thing touching my skin was the stupid, bulky cast on my leg.Then he walked me to the bed and helped me sit on the edge before he worked his own clothes off his body.All of this was done in complete silence.I didn’t know what to say and he didn’t seem to want to talk, so I let him run the show and take from me what he needed.
When he stood in front of me just as nude as the day he was born, he reached down and tipped my chin up until our eyes met.“I love you, Nell.Knew you were the one from the first moment we met.I saw the way you weren’t afraid to fight back.Saw that determination in your eyes.When you let me walk you back to your room, I knew you felt it, too.Even if you didn’t realize what it was then.”He swiped at a tear that dripped from my eyes.“Don’t want to waste another minute of our lives living separate because we can’t get our shit together and communicate.That’s the stuff that ruined my parents.It’s why neither of them are here anymore.I don’t want that for us.”
“Okay,” I whispered, knowing what he said was true even without the horrible fate of his parents haunting the dark shadows of my husband’s memories.
“If there’s ever a time when you don’t love me anymore, I will let you go.”I gasped at the ease with which he said that to me.“Hear me out, sweetheart.I will still fight for us, but I will let you go before we destroy one another.”
“Then I’ll do the same,” I agreed.
Rick shook his head.“Never going to be an issue for me, sweetheart.You’re my one and only.”He picked up my hand and laid it against his chest where I could feel the heat of his skin and the beat of his heart.“I love you.You are mine from here until they bury my ass six feet under.If it’s possible, you’ll still be mine long after, too.”
Another tear fell from my eyes as I reached around with my free hand and pulled at his hip to move him closer.“You are mine for just as long, Rick.Don’t ever doubt that.I love you.I’m in love with you.That’s never going to change.”
It was as if my confirmation was all my husband needed.He bent at his knees and scooped me in his arms to slide me further into the middle of the bed, then he crawled in behind me.“Just need to hold you like this for a bit.Need to feel your skin on mine and your heart beating.”
“Whatever you need,” I agreed.
