Page 9 of Safe Word
“Sleep, Carrie.”
Daylight hada way of turning unbridled passion into something more like regret. Slivers of golden sun peeked through Kannon’s curtains casting streaks of light across his bed, as I lay there trying to decide if I should get up or not.
Being swaddled in sheets that felt like heaven and smelled like him felt like a better decision than facing the ones I’d made in the past twelve hours. Kannon had been out of bed for a while, but I could still feel him.
I could still feel his hands on my skin and his breath on my neck. I could still feel the way his voice broke around my name right before he came. I wanted to hold on to that memory as long as I could, but eventually I would have to come up for air. The smell of coffee called to me louder than my need to hide away in his bed forever.
I ran my hands down my face, urging myself not to cry. I had shed enough tears in back seats of limos and ducked away in dressing rooms to last a lifetime. There was no reason for me tocry about what happened last night. Last night was everything. Last night was mine. Last night was the first thing I’d done just for me in a long time.
Unlike everyone else, Kannon hadn’t taken anything from me. I’d offered myself to him. Hell, I’d begged for it. What he gave was much more than I could have ever imagined. I lost track of how many orgasms I had. My brain was still foggy, and my throat was scratchy from screaming his name like a banshee all night.
Still, the light of day made everything heavier. A new day gave more gravity to the situation. It had been hours since I’d gone off the grid. I knew everyone was looking for me. The label, Cy—everybody was probably losing their shit by now, but I didn’t care.
That was a lie. I cared, but it felt good to not have to worry about any of that right now. Eventually, the cameras would find me. They always did. Eventually, I would have to honor the contract with the clause that turned my entire existence into a brand. It all rested at the back of my mind like a constant reminder not to ever be too happy.
I took a deep breath before sliding out of bed. Kannon’s shirt practically swallowed me whole, but for some reason, I loved the idea of wearing something that belonged to him. My bare feet were cool as I padded across the hardwood floor, following my nose to the kitchen. After the night I’d had, I could use some coffee.
I found Kannon pacing naked in the living room with his arms folded across his chest. Kannon was so majestic that I was frozen in place. He looked like perfection with the cords of his muscles stretching and flexing under his dark brown skin as he moved. Warmth started at my center and started to spread to my face as I watched him. I felt like I was intruding in on something sacred, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away.
The tightness in his shoulders bothered me. Either he heard or felt my presence because he looked back. I almost didn’t know what to say. “Thank you for last night” felt stupid. “Sorry I made you fuck me silly and make our relationship weird” was more appropriate. Both statements felt like a trap.
“Good morning,” he said, voice gruff and indicative of him being up all night long, fucking my brains out.
“Morning.” I finally breathed as my fingers curled against the hem of his T-shirt.
I wanted to tell him that I didn’t regret last night. In fact, I loved it. Still, in a way, I did regret it. Now things between us were different. I could feel the shift in the air. I wasn’t ready to acknowledge what that meant when I didn’t even know what was waiting for me when I left his house. I didn’t want to drag Kannon into my shit.
For a while, neither of us spoke. We stood there staring at each other in an awkward silence for a little too long, before his eyes slowly raked down to the place where my fingers lingered. They roved back up to my mouth just as my lips parted.
“Um, about last night,” I blurted before I lost my nerve.
“Yeah?” His brows hiked like he was bracing for the impact of what I would say next.
“I-I don’t regret it. I hope that’s not what you’re thinking.”
His jaw ticked, but he shook his head. I didn’t know if I bought it. “Nah.”
“Now where are your clothes?” I asked, finally cracking a smile.
“In my closet. I don’t wear clothes while I’m home. I really didn’t think about it. I’ll throw something on if me being naked bothers you.”
It did, but not in the way that he was thinking. “It’s your house. I’ve seen you naked now.”
“I made coffee.” He changed the subject.
“I smell it. That’s what made me drag myself out of bed.”
“I didn’t know how you liked yours, or I would have poured you a cup.”
“Thank you. I hope you have eggs. I’m craving an omelet.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever made an omelet.”
“You don’t have to. I’m famous for my omelets.”
He chuckled. “Is that right? I could have sworn you were famous for something else.”
“Nope. It’s the omelets. All you have to do is point me in the right direction, and I’ll get on it.”
