Page 41 of And Still Her Voice
“Sounds like quite a nightmare.” River chuckled. “You know, like I said before, if I’d had the courage, I would have killed Dilbert myself.”
Morbidly curious, I peered into River’s dark, soulful eyes, the skin around the left one already healing that yellowish green color. I knew the different shades of bruises from experience. I wiped my eyes and then sunk onto the bed.
He sat down next to me. “After I sang the other night, Dilbert came up to offer me a job singing there.”
“Yeah, I remember.”
“He asked me to come back to his office and then he came on to me. First he put his hand on my chest.” River chuckled. “You should have seen his freaked-out face when he realized my bra was stuffed with socks. I backed away, but then he grabbed my crotch. He punched me in the face, before throwing me to the ground and kicking me.”
“Oh my God! So this was all happening as I was out front playing the piano?”
“When he finished pounding on me, he went to his desk drawer and pulled out a gun and yelled, ‘Get the fuck out of here, you nigger faggot, before I call the police.’ I wanted to kill him right then and there.”
“I’m so sorry.” I reached out to touch River’s arm, still bruised from where Dilbert had kicked him. “I wondered where you’d gone and then I saw you limping out the front door. Do you think he called the police?”
River shrugged his shoulders, got up, and walked to the window, his back to me. I wondered if I could trust him.
“You can trust him,” Grandma whispered.
“He tried to rape me,” I said, and River pivoted toward me. “And then the gun went off.”
Head cocked, River stared at me dubiously. “Did you shoot him?”
“Not exactly, and I know what it looks like.”
“I’m not sure I do.”
I explained quickly how it happened.
“What about the fire?”
I shrugged. “I have no idea.” I wasn’t ready to tell him about another of my quirks. I wasn’t a pyromaniac.
“Aren’t you tired of running? How long can you keep this all in?”
“So, you think I should turn myself in?”
“No, but—it’s just that I know what it’s like.”
I held my head. “I know. Mary said something about confronting my fears so that I can move past them. I thought she was talking about Everett.”
“Yeah, you need to talk to Mother Mary, but not about Everett or Dilbert. You need to talk about how to get rid of your Grandma.”
“Excuse me?” Grandma squawked out loud. “Darling, cut me off and you’ll have no connection to the past.”
“Whose past?” I responded. “I don’t care about your past. I’ll create a new future for myself.”
“Darling, no woman is an island.”
***
My heart raced as I stuffed my knapsack wondering if Mother Mary could help me. I needed to get out of here sooner thanlater. I looked around the bedroom to make sure I hadn’t missed anything.
“Well you certainly mustn’t tell her anything,” Grandma said. “As evolved as you may think she is, she won’t understand. She’ll turn you in. Don’t be naive.”
“I’m not naive. You are. Besides, you told me to listen to my gut.”
I turned to find Mother Mary standing in the doorway. “New lyrics?”
