Page 102 of The Highlander's Princess Bride
He threw her a veiled glance. “You seemed to manage him.”
She shrugged. “I’m neither delicate nor overly sensitive, as you know.”
“Thank God for that.”
She tried not to wince, knowing he meant it as a compliment. “I take it she didn’t do well with your brothers, either.”
“To be fair, she was kind to Kade, sharing her love of music with him. She and Logan rubbed on well together too. He can charm any woman, and God knows my wife wasn’t immune to charming men.”
That sounded like another black mark against Logan Kendrick. “I’m sorry it was so difficult.”
“Life is difficult, is it not?”
“Too much, sometimes,” she replied softly.
He rubbed his forehead with the tips of his fingers, like she did when she had a headache. “Forgive me for sounding so mawkish, Victoria. Our life together wasn’t always terrible. When Janet became pregnant with Cam, I brought her down to Glasgow. She was happy there, until our son was born. But then she fell into a profound melancholy. Though I had the best doctors treat her, they simply counseled patience and prescribed laudanum.”
She grimaced. “Laudanum was probably not helpful in her situation.”
He glanced at her in surprise. “You know women who suffered that condition?”
“In one of my positions, the lady of the house suffered a similar ailment after the birth of her third child. It took several months for her to recover. Alcohol and laudanum drops only seemed to worsen her condition.”
He pondered that for a few moments before continuing. “Janet’s spirits improved somewhat after I procured a wet nurse and took Cam back to Kinglas. Her doctors thought it best for her to remain in Glasgow, and she seemed genuinely happier for a while. She even began socializing again. After a time, I asked her to return to Kinglas, but she refused.”
“And she didn’t mind being separated from her husband and baby?”
He hesitated, as if searching for the right words again. “She loved Cam, but she believed it best that he remain with me at Kinglas. As for our relationship . . .”
She reached over and took his hand, sure about what would come next. His fingers wrapped around hers, holding tight.
“Eventually, rumors began to circulate that Janet was engaging in affairs. When I came down to Glasgow to confront her, she broke down and admitted they were true. She’d taken a lover.” He stared intently at the fire, as if to avoid her eye. “More than one, actually.”
Even though she’d been expecting infidelity, Victoria was still shocked. She could feel the intensity of Arnprior’s pain and bewilderment. It seemed that all these years later his wife’s betrayal remained a devastating mystery.
After a minute or so, she finally dared break the fraught silence. “What did you do?”
He glanced down at their hands, as if surprised he was still holding on to her. “Oh. I forgave her, or at least tried to. She was genuinely distraught that she’d hurt me and distressed by her reckless conduct. When she begged me to give her another chance, I couldn’t say no.” He flashed her a rueful smile. “I never could.”
“Because you’re a good man and you loved her.”
“If Ihadsaid no earlier on, if I’d been more decisive with her, she might still be alive today. I might have been able to save her.”
She frowned. “Your wife fell ill and died, did she not? How could that be your fault?”
He finally met her gaze. “Janet killed herself. And the fault for that rests with me.”
Chapter Nineteen
When Arnprior released her hand, Victoria let it hang slack between them. All she could do was stare at him. He looked like he hated himself—and the world.
“I . . . I don’t know what to say,” she said, struggling with disbelief, “except that your wife must have lost her reason. Surely she had no cause to take her own life.”
“She was desperately unhappy. Unfortunately, I didn’t realize how unhappy. I thought she was simply angry with me because I insisted she move back to Kinglas if she wished to save our marriage. Staying in Glasgow was not an acceptable option.”
“Indeed not,” she said gently.
“Janet thought that I should trust her enough to let her remain at Kendrick House.” He sighed. “I truly wish I had let her do so, regardless of what might have happened.”
